Delinquent Daddy (Banks / Kincaid Family #2)(15)

Unable to watch the repentant features that looked so truly genuine, Ellie turned and crossed her arms over her chest.

"So you did," she murmured, though she was sure he could hear in her voice that she'd never forgiven or forgotten.

A tense moment of silence followed, and finally he murmured, "Is that why you told me you had a miscarriage?

Because I was such a jerk?" He sucked in a breath. "Jesus, Ellie, I was a stupid, immature kid who was scared out of my mind. How could you—"

"And what do you think I was?" she broke in incredulously, spinning to glare at him. "I was three years younger than you 61

Delinquent Daddy

by Linda Kage

and a lot less experienced in the ways of the world. What do you think it was like for me?"

"Okay." He lifted a hand to hush her. Glancing toward the hallway, reminding her Cassidy was still just down the hall, he repeated, "Okay," in a calm tone that made her want to rail at him all that much more. But how could he keep a level head when all she wanted to do was scream, and throw stuff, and cry?

Hissing out a disgusted breath, she spun away and pressed a hand to her thumping heart. Tears threatened, and she gnashed her teeth to keep them away. But damn it. She hadn't let herself cry over Boston Kincaid since—

"So I was a stupid, immature, selfish kid," he revised. "I didn't care about anyone but myself, and I freely admit that. I cannot tell you how sorry I am about how I treated you. I will always regret the things I did and said." He drew out a long, loud sigh. "I mean, God, if I'd known then I'd never feel for a woman the way I felt about—"

Ellie whirled to gape at him at the exact moment he broke off. She gulped when she found an expression of shocked horror on his face as he realized how much he was about to reveal. But that last word of his statement, though never spoken, seemed to hover in the air above them.

Lips parting in stunned disbelief, she could only watch as Boston shook his head like he was trying to deny what he'd just blurted out. His chest expanded as he sucked in a breath.

Then he licked dried lips and sent her a wary glance.

"This isn't why I'm here," he stated, sounding a little desperate, as if he was trying to convince himself of that fact 62

Delinquent Daddy

by Linda Kage

more than he was trying to convince her. "I'm here because I have a daughter, and you kept her from me. And I want her to know who I am."

But Ellie couldn't process anything past If I'd known then that I'd never feel for a woman what I felt for you, you, you, you, you...

She'd never thought he actually cared for her...at least not after it was all said and done, when her eyes had been opened to his stupid, immature, selfish ways...not after she no longer thought she was crazy in love with him. No. Then she'd been able to see how much she hadn't meant to him, how it'd only been about the sex for him.

Shaking her head in an effort to clear the racing thoughts, she swallowed and hoarsely answered, "I don't know if that's such a good idea." Then she gritted her teeth, mad at herself by being swayed by his sweet words. It was foolish to believe, even for one second, that he'd actually changed, that he wasn't still that self-centered, immature jerk.

He'd used pretty words to get into her pants back then too, just like he was doing now. But this time around, he wanted something more precious than her virginity; he wanted her daughter.

"And why wouldn't it be a good idea?" he asked, jerking her attention back to the present.

Ellie took a deep breath. "I'll tell you why," she murmured evenly. Because I don't want you to take her away from me.

"Because she's gone nine years without a father and has done perfectly fine. Letting you into her world so suddenly will only 63

Delinquent Daddy

by Linda Kage

confuse and hurt her. She doesn't need you. She has a great life."

His jaw bunched and his eyes flared. She wondered briefly if he might actually attack her. Then he blew out a breath from between clenched teeth and growled, "Is that why she went behind your back to find me? Because she doesn't need me? Is that why she and her little friend scoured magazine after magazine until they found something that fit her daddy's description? Because she doesn't want me?" He shook his head slowly. "Try again, Ellie."

Ellie gave a shaky swallow; air wobbled through her lungs.

She couldn't remember feeling this scared since—God, this was probably the most frightened she'd ever been. She hadn't even been this frightened when she'd been eight and both her parents had died, leaving her with a great aunt she'd never met before, or when she'd been nineteen and the doctor had placed a new baby in her arms for her to raise alone.

"You can't have her," she said softly and bit back the wince. But damn it, why had she just revealed her deepest fear to him?

He didn't answer her immediately. He merely studied her as if trying to find more secrets she hid. Finally, he said,

"Right now, all I want to do is meet her. I want her to know who I am."

"Right now?" she repeated, latching onto that term. "What about later, then?"

His jaw went tight. "You don't want this to get ugly, Ellie. I am a good lawyer."

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