Deathtrap (Crossbreed #3)(94)
“Remember when I used to braid your hair?” he asked.
I smiled wistfully. “You were terrible.”
Crush scooted his chair all the way next to me and began to section off my hair to make two braids. I memorized the feel of his hands and that fatherly love.
“Does it have to be this way?” he asked. “Isn’t there a way I can stay in your life?”
I shook my head. “It’s too dangerous.”
“Danger is my middle name.”
“Where did you bury me?”
His hands paused for a moment before he worked on the plaits. “Next to your mama. Have you been out there lately?”
“No,” I whispered.
“Maybe you should. I bet she’d like you to visit her sometime.”
I turned in my chair to let him work on the left side. “Do you forgive me?”
“There’s nothing to forgive. Sometimes we have to make tough choices. Like I said, there’s nothing you could do that would make me stop loving you. I wasn’t the best father, and you deserved to have a mom in your life. Maybe I should have settled down with someone so you’d have that softness a woman needs. But I did my best. I even bought you that damn rabbit.”
I smiled wistfully as he finished up the braid.
We sat for a quiet moment, having said most everything that needed to be said. I hadn’t realized until I glanced up at the clock that it was after midnight, and I dreaded our good-bye. “I have to go.”
He cradled my head and kissed me on the temple. “If you change your mind, I’m here. You got that? This doesn’t have to be final.”
I peered up at him. “Why aren’t you shocked by my fangs?”
He shrugged. “I’ve seen a lot of weird shit. You’re not a monster, Cookie.”
I barked out a laugh. “I’m the Cookie Monster.”
“It’s not funny. I’m dead serious. Don’t ever think that I could love you less. Maybe I can’t be there anymore to give you advice or help protect you, but you know my door is always open. Always. You look like you can take care of yourself now, but find someone you can trust and accept their help. You were always stubborn about wanting to do things on your own. You can’t live life alone. I have my friends, and we’re tight. We’re family. We’d bleed for each other. That’s what you need to find, even if I can’t be a part of it. But don’t think that’s me saying I’m okay with it. Fuck the rules, Raven. If you ever need to come back, we can pack our shit and move to Puerto Rico. You got that?”
I fell into his arms. “Thank you.”
Crush squeezed me so tight I didn’t think he’d ever let go, and I didn’t want him to. I scrunched his long hair in one hand and stared into the empty living room as our hug dissolved.
“I need to talk to your friend,” he said. “Tell him to get his ass in here.”
I nodded.
Crush gave me three quick kisses on the cheek. I used to hate it because his whiskers and goatee would tickle. All those stupid times I’d pushed him away.
I brushed my hand down his cheek and tugged on his goatee. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
He gave me a tight grin and flashed a silver tooth. “That’s my line.”
“Find an old lady, will ya? You shouldn’t be living out here alone, you old bulldog. Someone needs to make you pick up your dirty dishes and drag your ass to bed.”
“I’ll think about it, Cookie.” He pressed his forehead against mine. “I love you, little girl. With all the fire in my heart.”
After our final words, I collected my jewelry box and finally left my past behind.
Chapter 25
Christian stood by the door and watched Raven until she got inside the car. He didn’t need to ask what had happened; he’d heard it all. Every word, every gasp, every teardrop hitting the tile, and even the fluttering of her heart when her father told her good-bye.
Christian empathized. When he’d left Ireland centuries ago, he did so knowing he’d never see his sister and father again. It was a bold move leaving home and sailing across the ocean. His father had refused to go, arguing that he was too old for such adventures. In truth, Ireland was all he’d ever known. While leaving his father was difficult, it was especially trying on Christian to say good-bye to Cassie, his younger sister. She was just a wee lass at the time, but Christian had always held a soft spot for her. She was adventurous and loved her big brothers, but there was no way he could drag a blind girl across an ocean to an unknown, savage land. He still remembered the way she held on to him so tightly that he’d had to forcefully push her away. That was long ago, yet hearing Raven’s homecoming dredged up all those old memories.
He wanted to reach out and tell her it would get easier. But words were of little consolation, and black deeds often erased what little goodness remained in an immortal. Better she learn that for herself. He’d already complicated things enough with kissing her by the river. What they needed was more distance between them, but he found it increasingly impossible to do, and not just because of their partnership.
During the ambush back at the Bricks, Christian’s chest had constricted when she offered him her blood. That was a great honor among Vampires, and even though she’d done it so he could fight, it was by no measure a worthless offering. And hearing the soft whisper of her blood inside his veins made it even more impossible to keep his feelings neutral.