Deathtrap (Crossbreed #3)(85)

What the hell is wrong with me?

Maybe I was caught in a vicious cycle of repeating my parents’ mistake of loving someone who couldn’t give themselves completely. That was all I knew about love.

He reached out to touch my face. “Raven—”

“Don’t make me say something we’ll both regret. Look, I appreciate you restoring my memory. I know I’m the one who asked you for the favor, but I can’t help it. I feel violated. I trusted you would never do something like that to me. Why didn’t you talk me out of it?”

His lips tightened, and he took a step back. “I can’t make it right. It won’t happen again, on my word. Even if you throw your naked body against mine and grind me like a cat in heat, I’ll make you remember every embarrassing detail.”

I flounced off. That was exactly the kind of thing I expected Christian to say. He was like Jekyll and Hyde, and I wasn’t sure which man was the real Christian Poe.

Nor was I certain which man I loved.

Because even as I stormed off alongside the river, it didn’t change a damn thing about what I felt for him.

I loved Christian, and somehow I was going to have to live with that ugly truth if I wanted to remain with Keystone. This was more than a job but a chance to have a makeshift family. I couldn’t allow my feelings to compromise what truly mattered. I already had a million reasons to hate Christian.

But somehow they weren’t enough.





Chapter 23





Christian and I didn’t have to walk for long topside before Wyatt found us. He’d first picked up Blue and Niko, who had quickly located each other after Blue made it up the elevator. We eventually drove back to the spot where we’d originally parked and waited for a long time in silence. No one had heard from Viktor or Shepherd, and our worst fears were taking root in our imaginations. Would Keystone continue without our leader?

Wyatt and Christian sat up front and kept watch. Gem peered over Blue’s shoulder at the baby until Blue finally handed her the sleeping bundle.

Blue stood up. “I’m going to search for Viktor.”

Niko blocked her from leaving the van. “We’re safer here.”

“He might be injured.”

“Needn’t worry about Viktor. He’s a cunning man with a better chance of escaping the underground than the rest of us. He’ll come back here, so we wait.”

Wyatt turned in his seat. “The good news is I don’t see any freshies. Shep wouldn’t miss the chance to come back and haunt me before leaving.”

Wyatt’s jokes belied his doleful expression.

“Is the baby warm enough?” Niko asked, removing his coat. “Wrap this over him.”

Blue reluctantly took the coat and sat down next to Gem, placing the blanket over the already-swaddled baby, who was sleeping.

“We need to get some food,” Gem said. “He’s probably hungry and too weak to cry.”

“First stop as soon as Shep comes back,” Wyatt promised, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. “Maybe I should turn on the lights.”

“Don’t run down the battery,” Christian muttered. “I’ll take a walk and see if I hear anything.” He opened the van door and got out.

I leaned forward and looked at the baby. He was a couple of months old if I had to guess. “What are we going to do with him?”

Niko sat down to my left. “We hand him over to the authorities. They’ll place him in an orphanage until someone adopts.”

“Is there a high demand for Sensor babies?”

“The orphanages prefer to place children in homes who are the same Breed. It’s not always easy. Many couples don’t like the stigma of handicapped children.”

“He looks perfectly healthy to me.”

“Yes, but I’m referring to Breed gifts. Children with defective gifts aren’t desirable. Our powers and unique gifts are what make us strong. Without a history of the parents, there’s no way to tell with an infant this small if his abilities are sufficient. But who knows. There might be a couple out there who doesn’t care about such things.”

Gem kissed the baby’s forehead. “I think he’s perfect just the way he is. I just love the way babies smell, don’t you? Here, smell his head,” she said, lifting him up to Blue.

Blue merely looked at the child before collecting Niko’s coat from the floor. “Don’t get attached; he’s not a puppy. Like it or not, we have to turn him in.”

Gem cradled the baby and smiled. “I know that. But look at his little nose. And those sweet little lips. Want to hold him, Niko?”

“Best not to wake him,” he replied, his hands clasped together.

“Oh, come on. How often will you ever get to hold a real baby?”

“Blue’s right. You shouldn’t get attached. Emotions make people do foolish things.”

She laughed. “Do you think I’m going to steal him?”

“The thought might enter your mind when it comes time to hand him over to the Regulators. Perhaps you should give him back to Blue.”

She pouted. “No. I want to hold him. He likes me. He’s all snuggly and warm.”

The baby began to squirm, and a few seconds later, a wail poured out of him.