Deathtrap (Crossbreed #3)(38)

“If Viktor didn’t give us a chance, who would? He’s giving us an opportunity to start over. Where would you be now if he hadn’t come along? Here we can forget our past and rebuild our lives.”

I stood up and straightened my tank top. “We might be done with the past, but the past isn’t done with us. Ever think of that? Maybe the only way to move forward isn’t to shove all our skeletons into a closet and pretend they never existed. The closet’s still there, Niko. And the next time you open it, all that shit’s going to fall on top of you.”

He slowly rose to his feet and cocked his head to the side. “You’re not talking about Viktor anymore. What are you contemplating?”

“Nothing.”

He narrowed his eyes, and I knew he could read my lie.

My father was an unresolved issue, and no matter how perfect my new life seemed, if I didn’t close that door once and for all, it was going to haunt me worse than any of Wyatt’s spooks. I might end up like Shepherd with mood swings and outbursts of rage.

I turned on my heel and headed toward the door. “I need to shower.”

“Raven!”

He followed behind me, and when I realized he wasn’t going to let it go, I flashed up the stairs and across the mansion.

After several flights of stairs, I reached my room on the third floor and closed the heavy door behind me. I liked Niko, but not enough to confide something that could make me look bad in front of Viktor. While we each shared the same tattoo, Niko was loyal to Viktor first and foremost. My plans had nothing to do with Keystone, and no one had any right interfering.

I’d stripped out of my shorts and was grabbing a clean pair of panties and some clothes from my armoire when all of a sudden, Niko burst into the room.

“Why did you run from me?” The door closed behind him, and his gaze followed my energy trail until he found me by the bed.

I stood there in nothing but a pair of panties. Could he see my nudity? My guess was no when he didn’t flinch or look away.

His eyebrows sank into an angry slash. “Everyone has secrets, but if you’re planning to do something that’ll hurt this organization, I can’t allow that to happen. Your energy flickered back there. Guilt.” He closed the distance between us. “It is not my job to protect you. Everyone must make their own decisions. But don’t waste our time. If you have a choice, then you need to make the right one.”

“Like you ignoring those guys who follow you around?”

His jaw set.

“You’re good at reading people’s light. Don’t tell me you haven’t spotted them once or twice when we’ve gone out. They sure as hell noticed you. And whoever that guy is, he’s not going anywhere. Ignore the past all you want, Niko, but eventually it’s going to make you pay attention. Why not face it on your own terms instead of waiting for it to destroy you? Don’t misinterpret my actions. I want to stay here. I want to start a new life and be a better person, whatever that means.”

Niko shook his head. “Keystone isn’t about angels and sinners. We help people, but your hands won’t be clean. Sometimes we have to turn a blind eye, and sometimes we have to kill. If you imagined yourself a monster before, don’t assume getting paid will change anything.”

“I thought that was the whole point of joining Keystone. To clean up our act.”

He took a few steps toward me. “It’s easy to lose yourself when you’re alone. Viktor uses our talents and keeps us from crossing the line. Otherwise, we would become no different from the men we hunt. We’re ideal for this job because we have nothing to lose, but that also makes us a danger to ourselves.”

“Viktor can’t control our lives.”

When I veered left to go through the open doorway to my bathroom, I felt his fingers swipe my bare back as if he were grabbing for my shirt.

Niko inclined his head when he realized I was naked. “Apologies.”

I sighed, not at all upset with him. “If Shepherd’s gone off the deep end and he does something to bring this organization down, then I’m with you. But… I also think we’re entitled to free will when it comes to personal matters. What I want isn’t going to hurt Viktor or the team.”

He turned away and strolled toward the window. “It’s not just about what could bring down Keystone. Viktor’s rules also protect us. Desire makes you weak, whether that desire is for love, revenge, or material things.” Niko moved around to the desk, feeling some of the objects on it. “It would be a shame to lose you, Raven. I’ve come to enjoy our private conversations.”

“That’s not a threat, is it?”

“You needn’t worry. This conversation is between us. But like Christian and Shepherd, I can see you’re still struggling with letting go. Those men who follow me are inconsequential. I have the power to walk away, whereas before Keystone, I didn’t. This is my life now, and I no longer entertain ghosts.” He furrowed his brow and held up the stainless-steel box. “Did you solve this yet?”

I shook my head. “It’s a cube for decoration. It has neat little etchings on the sides. Can you feel them?”

It danced on the tips of his fingers. “It’s a puzzle box. Didn’t you know?”

I strode around the bed and looked at it. “Gem translated the symbols, but she didn’t say it was… What exactly is a puzzle box?”