Dear Aaron(108)

He had me. He had me big time. And I was pathetic.

Fisting my hands, I groaned in resignation and held back a whine. “Just for… two minutes. Two minutes is all.”

I slid an eye in the direction of the waves gently rolling on to the beach, calm, black, black, black. No part of me wanted to go in there, but… I knew what he was trying to do. He knew what he was trying to do.

But…

I squeezed my hands into fists at my sides and told him the truth in a near croak. “I’m scared.”

He blinked and the next thing I knew, he was dropping into a crouch directly in front of me, his face just above mine. Both his hands went to one of mine, enveloping it in between his. His words were soft and gentle as he brought our palms toward his chest. “I’ll be with you the whole time. You know I wouldn’t just leave you out there to be mean.”

The worst part was, I knew he was telling me the truth. That was something my brothers would do, but not Aaron. Never Aaron. Not if he knew I was genuinely scared, which I was.

“Two minutes, that’s all. I just want you to know there’s nothing to be scared of. It’s past feeding time—”

I stopped breathing.

“Ruby.” His chuckle was low. “There’s more scary shit in the world out there than in the water, but it’s all about how you face the things that you’re not sure about, understand?”

I groaned at his words and the truth in them.

“You understand,” he answered his own question when I hadn’t. “Come on. I won’t leave you. You’re braver than you think.”

I was, wasn’t I? Or at least… I could be. Hadn’t I already shown myself that?

I didn’t want to be that chicken Ruby anymore, even though I might always be. Maybe. I didn’t want to be so scared of things that I actively avoided them. My mom, who had gotten her heart broken time after time, relationship after relationship, didn’t stop being scared of falling in love because it hadn’t worked out for her in the past. Besides losing, I couldn’t think of a single thing Jasmine was scared of. They were the two most fearless people I had ever known. I could be like them. We had the same DNA after all.

I didn’t even realize I was getting to my feet until I was on them. I definitely didn’t notice I was pulling off my shirt until it was over my head and I was dropping it on top of Aaron’s pile of clothes. What I did realize, just as my hands went to the elastic band of my shorts, was that Aaron was now standing up once more.

He was watching me. His eyelids were a little hooded and his eyes might have been focused in a dozen different places, but I couldn’t be sure because of the darkness. It was his turn to ask the same question. “What are you doing?”

I tugged my shorts down my legs and did the same shake he had before I stepped out of them. “Getting out of my clothes so I don’t get them wet,” I explained, using his exact same words. “I’m not getting naked.”

Even in the darkness I could tell his throat bobbed. But he didn’t say another word as I set my shorts down on top of the rest of the pile. Nerves and anticipation thrummed through my veins and arms, but screw it, I was going to do it. Two minutes. I could go in there for two minutes.

The breath that came out of my mouth was shaky and weak. “Are you sure I can hold on to anything that I want?”

Aaron raised an eyebrow in a way that had me thinking he was second-guessing his offer.

“All right, don’t forget what you said,” I warned him, taking a step closer to the water. “Let’s get this over with then.”

He kept his gaze on me a second longer before dipping his head just enough for it to be counted as a nod and then took a step forward. I waited until he was at my side to turn to face the water and wade in. His hand hung loosely at his side as we walked side by side, deeper into the cool but not cold water hitting my ankles, my shins, my knees. It wasn’t until the water lapped just over my knee that I shivered and took a half step to the side, closer to him.

I was halfway up to my thigh when I reached over and grabbed his forearm.

“That’s it?” he asked calmly the moment my fingers touched him.

I shook my head, looking down and trying not to freak out when the inky water started to lap at my hip. “Ah, nope.”

“Then what—”

I moved behind him like a ninja, the palms of my hands going to his shoulder blades, absently noticing his skin was warm. The ridges of Aaron’s spine rippled when I touched him, my palms sliding up to straddle each side of his neck. I knew what I was going to do, and I knew it wasn’t exactly what platonic friends did, but he’d said it, hadn’t he? I could grab whatever I wanted.

“Giddy up, cowboy,” I told him all of two seconds before I jumped on his back.

Looking back on it, I should have given him a longer warning or at least a better one.

Because he hadn’t been ready.

He hadn’t been ready.

Otherwise, if he had, I’m sure neither one of us would have fallen face first into the water, me on top of him, flying over him, pretty much somersaulting into a roll that had me snorting water up my nose the second my head dunked into the surface. For one second, I thought I was about to drown, taking way too long to get to my feet before I could shove my upper body out of the water with a gasp like I really had been on the verge of death.