Dauntless (Sons of Templar MC #5)(63)
“No hospitals,” she repeated, her voice rising. “No hospitals.” Hysteria mounted on her croaky, almost foreign voice.
With massive amounts of effort, Lucky managed to clear his face of the fury, the utter devastation eating at him. He turned it soft, looking into those dangerously empty eyes. “Okay, firefly, no hospitals,” he soothed.
She gazed at him for a long moment, long enough to shred his insides. She nodded briskly and bent her head once more to trace Gage’s arm. She didn’t seem to have any desire to leave those scarred arms. Those empty eyes showed not one glimpse of recognition. So, with even more effort, with pain that almost floored him, he stepped back.
“Let’s get out of here,” he said, not making eye contact with anyone in the room. Those empty eyes were the only thing he thought of. Utter fear at the prospect of being able to fill them up again. After that.
If he couldn’t fill them, there was one thing he could do.
Kill every single motherf*cker responsible for this.
Slowly.
Lily
Asher hadn’t stopped his bike when I flew off, my feet barely touching the ground as I sprinted past the various bikes parked outside the clubhouse. My heart was in danger of beating out of my chest. I didn’t stop until I made it into the common room. One that was always filled with laughter, with easy atmosphere that engulfed you in its warm glow the moment you stepped in. The utter silence had my heart silencing. Stopping.
“Where is she?” I demanded in a hoarse voice.
The men I had at first feared and then come to consider as family were scattered around the room. They were all in various positions, nearly every single one of them clutching a bottle of alcohol of some sort. Every single one of their strong gazes was tainted, etched in defeat.
I struggled to stay upright as fear blanketed my entire body. For these men to be beaten down to this, it had to be bad. Bad was what I’d been prepared for. Bex had been missing for weeks, so I had known it wouldn’t be good when we found her. But I hadn’t been prepared for how bad. My mind hadn’t been able to entertain that. Until now. Until I was confronted with it and couldn’t escape it. Something bad had happened to my best friend, my sister, and I wasn’t sure if I’d survive it.
I felt hands at my waist, yanking me into a hard body. “Flower,” a voice murmured. A voice that usually soothed me no matter what. Arms that took the weight off my chest the moment they made contact with my skin. They didn’t that time. Not with the ice running through my veins. Not with the weight of a thousand tons that settled on my chest the moment I registered the energy in the room. When I realized what that energy meant for Bex.
My entire body started to shake involuntarily as my gaze landed on Lucky. Or, more accurately, the top of Lucky’s head. It was bowed down, cradled in his large hands that rested on his knees. He hadn’t even moved when I spoke. Something about that position, a position of defeat, teetered me closer to the cliff I was in danger of tumbling off.
“Where is she?” I repeated, my voice raw, almost a screech.
Something in my tone, maybe the despair, registered and Lucky’s head snapped up. I physically recoiled at his face. At the emptiness there. There was no grin. No twinkle in his eye. Nothing. It was as if something had come along and sucked every inch, every possibility, of happiness out of his body and replaced it with something horrible, something ugly. Fury simmered underneath it, vengeance.
“Flower,” Asher said, his voice soft. Concerned. Knowing.
“Don’t ‘flower’ me,” I snapped. “I want to know where my best friend is. Right now.”
Cade stepped forward, his eyes first over my shoulder, meeting Asher’s gaze, then focusing on me. Their edges were crinkled slightly, soft. But the emptiness, maybe not the same gaping chasm as in Lucky’s but a fraction of it, was still there.
“She didn’t want a hospital,” he explained slowly.
Some part of me, some distant part, relaxed a smidgeon at the fact she was okay enough to communicate what she didn’t want. Another more aware part of me sank at the knowledge that she’d needed a hospital. At the flatness of Cade’s voice, mirroring an echo of the defeat on Lucky’s face.
“We’ve got someone we trust in there, treating her.” He lifted his chin to the door, where they held their ‘church.’
I nodded and stepped out of Asher’s arms, one destination in mind.
A gentle but firm grip on my shoulder stopped me. I glanced down at Cade’s hand and then glared at the owner.
I didn’t glare at anyone, apart from Asher because I was confident enough to come out of my shell with him. No matter how far I’d come from who I used to be, I was far from actively glaring at men who radiated badass-ness, despite their kind eyes. But this man, no matter how scary, hot, or intimidating he may be, was barring me from going to her. I’d engage in a physical altercation with him if need be. Not one I was likely to win, but I’d fight tooth and nail.
“You don’t want to see her right now, Lily,” he almost whispered. “It’s… not good.”
His words had a physical effect on me, stabbing me with daggers of meaning. I straightened my shoulders. “It’s not about what I want. Or what you think I want. It’s what she needs,” I hissed, then shrugged off his hand and strode purposefully towards the door, praying to be as fearless as I knew Bex would have been in my situation.