Dark Flame (The Immortals #4)(83)

“I think it’s been a while. You’re probably a bit rusty by now.”

He laughs, throws his head back and laughs, but he doesn’t remove his hand, no, it stays right there, smoothing my thigh.

“Okay, Ever, theoretically speaking, let’s say I did do this one small thing for you. Let’s say I did give you the antidote that would allow you and Damen to shag your little hearts out. Then what? How long do I have to wait for this so-called good karma to boomerang back at me? Can you tell me that?”

I shrug. “From what I’ve seen, you can’t force karma, it works on its own terms. All I know is, it works.”

“So, I’m supposed to just hand over something to you, something you desperately want, and risk getting nothing in return? That hardly seems fair darlin’, so maybe you should reconsider, maybe there’s something you can give to me.” He smiles, sliding his hand much higher, way higher, too high. And when he gazes into my eyes, trying to overpower me, lure me into his head like he used to—it doesn’t work. I remain right where I am, rooted in place.

And yet, that simple act alone has spawned an idea, one that might move this along even quicker than I hoped, and get me to the Montage, where I told Damen we’d meet.

“Well,” I say, doing my best to ignore the feel of his fingers splayed across my thigh. “If you won’t trust karma, will you at least trust me?”

He looks at me, head titled, Ouroboros tattoo flashing in and out of view.

“Because, come to think of it, I do have something to give you. Something I know for sure that you want. Something that only I can give you.”

“Well, bugger that!” He smiles. “Now we’re talkin’. I knew you’d come around eventually, I knew you’d see the light.” He scoots even closer, grips my leg tighter.

But I just continue to sit there, breathing steadily, evenly, aware of the light still shining inside me when I say, “It’s not that—it’s—it’s something much better than that.”

He squints. “Aw, now don’t be so hard on yerself, darlin’. First time’s always a wash. I promise we’ll have plenty of goes for you to improve your skills and get better.”

And even though he laughs when he says it, obviously wanting me to laugh too, I don’t. I’m still thinking about what I just said, this new plan now forming in my head. Knowing it won’t be exactly what he expects, and may cause him to hate me even more, but still, it’s the only way I can think of to get him to connect—well, if one can actually connect with a lost soul, that is . . .

“Let go of my leg.” My eyes gaze into his.

“Ah, bugger!” He shakes his head. “See, I knew you were full of it—you’re nothing but a tease, Ever, you know that? Nothing but—”

“Let go of my leg and take hold of my hands instead,” I say, my voice calm, determined. “Trust me, you have nothing to lose, I promise you that.”

He hesitates, but only for a moment before he does as I ask. The two of us sitting cross-legged on the bed, my bare knees pressed against his, his hands gripping mine, the whole scene reminding me vaguely of the binding spell that started this mess.

Only this is nothing like that.

Nothing at all.

I’m about to take a huge leap of faith. I’m about to share something with Roman that’ll definitely result in his handing over the antidote. Looking him straight in the eyes when I say, “Your argument is flawed.”

He squints.

“Your argument. About there being nothing but the here and now. If you truly believed that, then why were you trying to connect with Drina? If you truly believe that there’s nothing beyond this, the earth plane, where we sit now, then exactly what is it you were trying to connect with?”

He looks at me, obviously flummoxed when he says, “Her essence—her—” He shakes his head, tries to let go of my hands, but I just grip his tighter. “What the hell is this?” he asks, clearly unhappy with me.

“It doesn’t end here, Roman. There’s more, lots more. More than you could ever imagine. This, what you see here—this is all just a tiny little blip on a much bigger screen. But I have a feeling that despite what you say, you already sense that. And because you already sense that, you’re open to it. And so, with that in mind, I’m wondering if we can maybe broker some kind of deal.”

“I knew it!” He laughs and shakes his head. “I knew you hadn’t given up. Never say die, Ever, right?”

But I just ignore it, forging ahead when I say, “If I take you to Drina, if I show you where she rests, will you give me the antidote?”

He drops my hands, his face blanched, shocked, clearly struggling to steady himself. “You putting one over on me?”

“No.” I shake my head. “I’m not. I’m really not. I swear.”

“Then why are you doing this?”

“Because it only seems fair. You give me what I want most, and I’ll give you what you want most. You may not like what you see, you’ll probably even end up hating me—but I’m willing to take that chance. And I promise you, I’ll give you the whole, unobstructed view. I’ll hold nothing back.”

“And—what if you give me what I want and I still don’t give you the antidote? What then?”