Conviction(66)

I watch Conner rake the fingers of his left hand through his hair. His right hand, never leaves mine.

“What a wanker. What a complete and utter wanker,” Josh says.

“Oh, but it gets better,” Sophie adds.

“Then he tells me, he wants all the money back that he loaned me. At that stage, it was still about one hundred thousand. The business was doing well, but we were just about to open our second or third salon, I can’t remember which.”

I look Conner in the eye. “So I did it. When Marcus asked, I said, yes.”

His stare gives nothing away. “You married Marcus Newman?” he asks. I nod.

Josh and Conner know Marcus. We all went to primary school together and they would’ve seen him around town with my brother over the years.

“And that’s who you’re divorcing? Who you’ve been married to for the last eight years?”

I nod again. “He was safe, Con. I wouldn’t survive having my heart broken again, and there was no possibility he would be able to do that. I didn’t love him, so I was safe. That doesn’t mean that I didn’t try. I did. I tried to be the perfect wife for him. I gave myself over to him. I let him, my brother and my parents mould me into what they wanted me to be.” I don’t want to cry, so I decide to end the story there.

“So why the divorce? What happened to you being the perfect wife and daughter?” Conner asks.

I let out a long sigh and look over at Soph, who gives me a small nod, encouraging me to go on. “I was so lonely. After all the begging and pleading Marcus had done to get me to go out with him and to be his wife, once he had me, he wasn’t the slightest bit interested. We have nothing in common. He’s away most weekends playing golf. We only really go out together if it’s a work function for him, or some political event my mother insists we attend. But because I’m this stupid na?ve woman, I’d convinced myself that we could make it work. That if we had a child together, it’d make everything right between us. But I can’t even get that right.” A tear drips from my lash and rolls down my cheek.

“Meebs,” Conner says very quietly, shaking his head. I put my hand up, I need him to know what he’s in for if we’re going to give a relationship a go.

“When I miscarried, they found out I was suffering from polycystic ovaries. It doesn’t mean that I can’t have kids, but it could mean that it’s more difficult for me to conceive and carry a child to full term, but yeah anyway, it’s irrelevant now. We tried for a while to have a baby but it never happened and now, with hindsight, that’s probably for the best.”

“The bloke’s unstable. I know you want kids Neen, but you were lucky not to fall pregnant with him.”

Conner’s eyes flick from Sophie to me. “Why’s he unstable?”

I let out another one of those breaths that they write about in books. “He came home drunk one night and for no reason he attacked me.”

“What the f*ck, Meebs?” Conner pulls his hand from mine, laces his fingers together behind his head and glares at me. His brows drawn down into a deep frown. “Did you press charges?” he asks.

“He’s a lawyer, Con, he’d lose his job. Be struck off even.”

He pushes up from his chair loudly and stands. “So f*cking what, it’d serve the f*cker right. He put his hands on you Meebs. He should’ve been nicked for it.”

I close my eyes and rub my fingertips over my temples. “All I want is a divorce, Con. If I press charges, he’ll make it difficult. I just want to draw a line under the biggest f*ck up of my life and be left alone to move on.”

He’s pacing the floor as he talks, “He should pay for what he did… What did he do, did he hurt you?” He leans on the back of the chair toward me.

“Yeah, he hurt her. I tried to get her to go to the police, but she wouldn’t,” I shoot Sophie a look as she tells Conner this.

He shakes his head at me. “If he comes near you again, I’ll kill him. Him and your prick of a brother. I’ll kill the f*cking pair of them.”

I have nothing left to say, no argument left in me. I’m so tired, so ready for sleep.

“I need to get going, Con. I’ve got a shit load to do today and I’ve had no sleep,” Josh says, standing up from the table.

“I’ll come with you,” Sophie adds, standing up too.

“Well, I might as well come with you two,” I add.

“You can sit the f*ck down, you’re going nowhere,” Conner says to me.

“Don’t tell me what to do.” I put my hands on my hips and look at him.

“Meebs, please. Will you stay? We need to talk.”

I fold my arms across my chest and sit back in my chair, way too tired to put up a fight. I ask Sophie to make sure Duch is doing all right up on the roof terrace and to make sure she’s fed and has water.

She gives me a cuddle. “Give him a chance, Neen. You two are so good together and still bang in love. This is like a real-life fairy tale. This is your chance at a happy ending, princess. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” I tell her.

Conner has called his driver to give them a lift home and ten minutes later we’re standing at his front door, waving them off.

As soon as Con shuts the door, he grabs my hand and pulls me up the stairs and into his bedroom.