Consolation Prize (Forbidden Men #9)(95)
“I’m a mess too,” I cried, pressing my hands to my chest. “I’m always doubting myself and worrying about shit and feeling out of control.”
Holy hell, I’d thought the guise I put on to appear as perfect as possible always failed, sure everyone could see straight through me. And yet…it’d faked out my two best friends, of all people.
“You sure know how to cover it up well, then, honey,” Sasha said kindly. “Because, damn…”
“Yeah, you need to work on that,” Tyla told me. “It makes us mortals feel better when we see you at your low point too…kind of like tonight. In fact, you get an A for unloading all that on us tonight.”
I smiled and nodded. “Okay, I’ll work on that.”
I guess maybe I had been the one pushing them away then, not the other way around. Realizing what kind of mess I really was, I started to apologize to them for not sharing any of my issues when my phone rang.
Seeing Colton’s name, I gasped. “Oh, shit. He’s probably been texting me all night. He said he was going to text when he got home to make sure I made it inside okay. I bet he’s worried as hell.” Holding up a finger to my girls, I answered with a breathless, “Hey, sorry. I had my text messages on vibrate only.”
“Holy shit,” he exploded into my ear. “I put my shoes back on and had my wallet in hand, ready to go back over there and check on you when I realized I hadn’t actually tried calling yet. You gave me f*cking heart failure, baby doll. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine,” I assured him. I glanced at Sasha and Tyla. “I’m actually doing great. I had a little best friend therapy and got carried away girl-talking. I totally forgot you were going to text. So, yeah, everything is fine. I didn’t mean to worry you. I guess you got home okay, too?”
“Yeah, it’s all good here. I’m not so tired anymore, especially not after worrying about you. Did you say girl-talk?” he asked, sounding suddenly interested. “Oh, Jesus. You three are hanging out on your bed in your underwear, having a pillow fight, aren’t you?”
I rolled my eyes, and Sasha snickered because she’d heard his question. A devilish gleam entered Tyla’s eyes right before she loudly proclaimed, “Let’s practice kissing again.”
“Wait, what did she say?” Colton demanded, making my roommates roll with laughter. “Maybe I should come over and check on you anyway,” he suggested.
“Goodnight, Colton,” I told him firmly, rolling my eyes. “I love you.”
I hung up on him and sent my friends an exasperated glance. “He’s such a guy.”
They were both too busy gaping at me with their mouths open to answer.
I blinked, confused. “What’s wrong?”
“Honey,” Tyla said slowly. “Do you realize you just told that boy you loved him?”
“No, I didn’t,” I said slowly, running the conversation back through my head until I got to the farewell, and then all warmth drained from my face. “Oh my God, what have I done?” I turned my beseeching gaze to them and flapped my hands restlessly. “What do I do, what do I do, what do I do?”
Before they could answer, my phone vibrated. “Oh, God,” I uttered. “He just texted me, didn’t he?”
Tyla and Sasha dove for my phone while I remained frozen. As they greedily read the screen, I finally found the courage to ask, “What’d he say?”
Neither answered for a moment, and then Sasha read the message aloud. “He said, Ha, I knew you’d say it first.”
I blinked and snagged the phone from their hands. “That’s all?”
That bastard. Was he not going to say it back, or at least tell me he didn’t feel the same? How dare he leave me hanging?
Two seconds later, another message popped up.
I released a breath, and my shoulders sagged, beyond comforted. “That f*cking jerk,” I said, grinning and shaking my head as I showed my friends the new message. “He made me sweat through another two seconds on purpose.”
And I kind of loved him even more for it because it was just so him.
JULIANNA’S CHAPTER | 27
The next day was a Saturday, no college classes, so I didn’t have to worry about how I was going to act around Colton in philosophy. I’d never told a guy I loved him over the phone before. Actually, the only other person I’d said it to had been Shaun, and he’d proposed directly after that and we’d spent the rest of the day in bed together.
I shuddered with revulsion, just thinking about him and that day, while a nasty taste filled my tongue. Remembering other guys felt wrong now. I kind of wished everything had started with Colton because he was the only thing that felt right.
And yet I was sitting here stressing about how I was going to behave around him the next time I saw him.
We both knew we loved each other now.
What would I say to him about it? Just blurt it out again first thing? What if he retracted his part of it because he really had gotten a concussion the night before, and he’d been deliriously half out of his mind when he’d texted those three words?
I kind of wanted to puke from stressing myself out so bad.
Sasha was working all day, and Tyla was at Theo’s—I was afraid she wasn’t breaking up with him but making up, ugh—so I couldn’t bother my friends with my worries.
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