Colton Christmas Protector (The Coltons of Texas #12)(45)
She tipped back her head, allowing the tension in her body to flow out, surrendering to his magic touch.
Reid. That’s Reid Colton you’re melting for. The sobering acknowledgment was quickly silenced by a competing voice that reminded her he’d saved her life, exonerated himself regarding Andrew’s death and proven himself trustworthy.
And no matter how much time has passed or how much your life has changed, he still makes your heart race as much today as when you were a teenager and fell for his devastating good looks and rakish charms. That was the issue she faced in a nutshell. She’d always been hopelessly attracted to Reid, and the signals he sent her now, his returned interest, made her head spin and her suppressed longings fire to life.
“You never answered me,” she said drowsily, savoring the sweet lassitude that sank to her bones. “Are you happy with your life?”
Chapter 13
Reid twisted his mouth as he thought, then cast a sultry side glance to her. “I’m happy right now...here with you.”
Her pulse staggered, and she realized that, despite the turmoil and danger they’d encountered in the past few days, she was happy right now, too. With Reid.
But what if she was wrong about him? What if his story about how Andrew died was a lie? What about the way her father had bowed and scraped for all the Coltons while ignoring her for her whole life? Were her feelings of hostility toward his family just a manifestation of little-girl jealousy and hurt?
She’d seen a different side to Reid when he’d become Andrew’s partner and friend. He still had moments of acting the entitled rich boy, the arrogant jock she’d known in high school, but she knew more facets of Reid now. He was deeper than his shallow mother, kinder than his snobbish half siblings and had an innate sense of justice and protectiveness that had drawn him into a career he’d not needed for the income, but undertook to fulfill a sense of purpose and duty.
She sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of her nose.
“Something wrong?” he asked, his hands stilling on her feet.
“Only that you quit rubbing my feet,” she replied with a lopsided grin, then grew more serious. “And I overthink things. I rationalize and nitpick things to death.”
“Having an analytical mind isn’t a bad thing.”
“I said overthinking. I have trouble letting things go sometimes and accepting things at face value.”
He focused his deep blue gaze on her and frowned. “What are you overthinking at the moment?”
She swallowed hard and curled her fingers around the hem of her sweater. “You.”
His eyebrows shot up for a moment, then formed an inquisitive V. Shifting on the couch, he let her feet fall to the floor as he stretched toward her. “Is there anything I can do to help you decide your feelings about me?” His hand settled at her waist as he lay across her body, pressing her into the cool leather cushions. “Maybe this?” He brushed his lips across the pulse point on her neck.
Her breath snagged, and her fingers curled around his shoulders.
“Or this?” Reid nipped the tip of her chin, and her head swam muzzily.
“Reid...” she rasped.
He raised his head to look deeply into her eyes. “I want you, Pen. I won’t pretend otherwise any longer. But if this isn’t what you want, you can tell me to go to hell, and I’ll respect your feelings.”
She opened her mouth to reply, but so many thoughts and emotions battled inside her, she could only stare at him mutely.
When she didn’t reply, his expression darkened. He levered farther away from her as if to leave, and she tightened her grip on his shirt.
“Pen?” He angled his head, clearly trying to read her.
“I...need more time.” Her heart thrashed in her chest like a wild animal tangled in a snare. She felt trapped, caught between loyalty to Andrew and a years-old lust for Reid. Factoring in the mind-numbing twists her life had taken, her father’s deceit and the foggy road that was her future, how could she know what was right? For both her and Nicholas, because she had to put her son’s needs at the top of her considerations.
Reid bowed his head briefly, his disappointment plain. “More time. Right. Because we’ve only known each other for fifteen some odd years. Been friends for seven.”
“Andrew—”
“Has been gone for over a year,” he finished for her, his voice noticeably tighter. Pain flashed in his eyes, and he shoved away from her. “All right. I promised to respect your choice, and I will.”
Freed of his weight and warmth, a stark chill sliced through her. Confusion or not, she didn’t want to be without him. She did desire him, value the protection he offered, appreciate his friendship.
“Wait!” she cried before he could rise from the couch. She sat up, shifting her legs under her to kneel on the cushion beside him. “Reid, I’m still sorting out my feelings, but I want...” Her throat tightened. “I need...”
He arched an eyebrow to indicate he was listening, waiting.
She drew a slow breath, her body quivering from the inside out. She threaded her fingers through the hair near his ear before cupping the back of his head and drawing him close. “This...” she whispered as she slanted her mouth over his.
Her kiss was tentative at first, testing the reality of a dream she’d had since she was a teenager. Her body hummed its approval, her blood rushing to her head and to her most intimate places.