Cold Justice (Willis/Carter #4)(36)

Jeanie went out with Lauren to talk to her.

‘Are you sure about this, Lauren?’

‘Yes.’

Jeanie hugged her before returning inside. ‘She’ll be all right, Toby,’ Jeanie told him as she came back into the lounge.

He shook his head slowly. ‘All this. All this mess. It’s all my fault.’ He had retreated further into the sofa, doubled over as if in pain; he hugged his legs.

Jeanie sat next to him.

‘You’re doing all right, Toby. I know it’s hard. It’s so tough on you all.’

‘But, it all comes back to me. My father left all this stuff for me to deal with. Did he hate me so much that he didn’t want us to have any happiness from the minute he died?’

‘I don’t think he hated you, Toby.’

‘Then you don’t understand anything.’

‘Tell me.’

He took a deep breath and stood. ‘Do you mind if I go out?’

‘No, of course not.’

‘I want to walk up to the Observatory.’

‘Come on, we’ll get some fresh air.’

Toby nodded, his eyes on the floor as he got his coat and waited for Jeanie at the door. They walked down the stairs and through reception. As soon as they came in view of the press twenty feet away, the cameras started flashing. Toby turned his head away. Questions were shouted at him about his father, about Lauren and his relationship. A reporter asked if, given Toby’s job, it was possible Samuel had been abducted by aliens. Jeanie glared at them all. They passed a police officer standing outside the entrance to the apartment block who was taking the full brunt of the bitter wind off the river.

‘Make sure you step outside if someone approaches the building,’ Jeanie said. ‘Don’t let anyone but residents in – with proof of residency. But get out of the wind, shelter in the foyer.’

‘Yes, thank you, ma’am.’

Jeanie stopped to look back at the front door. When they were out of sight of the press and protected by an escort of five officers, Jeanie turned to ask, ‘Toby, when you got back here and you saw the empty buggy, where did you think Samuel was? What was the first thought that came into your head?’

‘I thought he had undone his belt and run off.’

‘Has he ever done that before?’

‘No, I don’t think so.’

‘Can he undo his own belt?’

‘I don’t know. But, maybe I didn’t do it up properly?’ He shook his head anxiously.

‘Do you think you would have noticed before then that the belt wasn’t done up?’

‘Yes, I suppose so, but I just didn’t understand where he could be. That was the only explanation I could think of.’

‘The whole time you were out with him, he never got out of the buggy? You didn’t have to take him to the toilet? You didn’t have to make him walk a little way?’

‘No. He was not himself. He was grizzling a lot and then he fell asleep. I was so relieved that he was not making a fuss any more that I just didn’t check on him.’

Toby looked at Jeanie. She nodded, smiled sympathetically. She knew very well that there wasn’t a parent out there that wouldn’t have understood.

‘Listen, I have a little girl,’ she said, ‘and I understand the pressures. I know what it’s like. I would have felt the same way – thank goodness she’s fallen asleep, I can have a little browse in the shops, have a little peace.’

‘Yes, I suppose so.’

‘You don’t have to feel guilty for feeling that, Toby. It’s natural. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent.’

Toby looked over at Jeanie and shook his head.

‘Lauren does all the parenting with Samuel. I’m still a novice.’

‘Just because your dad wasn’t a good parent, Toby, doesn’t mean that you can’t learn to be. Your wife tends to take the reins, I understand, but you love your son just as much as she does, I’m sure. Don’t you? We’re all human and when our mind’s on a million things we take our eye off the ball just for a few seconds. Did you leave him outside a shop, even for a minute?’

‘Yes,’ Toby blurted, relieved to get it out. ‘I left him when I was looking at the saxophone. The pop-up shop that has second-hand instruments.’

Jeanie’s mind was working out the CCTV coverage. ‘Let’s walk, show me the shop.’

They crossed over the busy centre of Greenwich and headed towards the park and then took a side road that ran up and beside it.

‘Is this it?’ They stopped outside a small temporary shop with writing across the window.

‘Yes, I left him here.’

Jeanie looked around. The place was about ten feet from the start of the park. It was a dark side street that would have been known only to those that already knew of its existence. There were no cameras on the street that she could see. They stepped inside.

‘Hello.’ Jeanie showed her badge. ‘Mind if I ask you a few questions?’

The lad with the ginger dreadlocks and the piercings nodded, bemused; he was looking at Toby curiously.

‘Go ahead.’

Jeanie turned and pointed to Toby.

‘Do you remember seeing this man Monday afternoon?’