Chasing Forever (The Forever Series #1)(20)
Regan exhaled loudly. “Both of us know it’s unlikely I’ll be offered a permanent position here. Tell me what’s really going on. I don’t trust you.”
Lucas’s smile faded. “Wait.” He pushed away from the wall. “What do you mean you know you won’t be offered a permanent position?”
Regan stuffed her notepad in her briefcase and stood up. “I’d love to be offered an associate position in the corporate litigation department, but that would mean we would work together on a somewhat permanent basis, and neither of us wants that. We can hardly stand each other, and like I said, I could never trust you, not for a minute. I don’t want to work with someone I can’t trust.”
Lucas lifted his head toward the ceiling and shook his head. “Wow. I don’t know what to say.”
“There’s nothing to say,” Regan shot back and started walking toward the door.
“Listen,” he demanded as he loosely grabbed her arm. “I would never interfere with you receiving an offer at Martin and Black. If you’re qualified, and you are, I want you on my team, not sitting at the opposing counsel’s table.”
Regan pulled out of his grip and averted her gaze. “Give me one reason why I should believe anything that comes out of your mouth.”
Lucas cupped her chin with his hand, forcing her to look at him. “Regan, I’m really sorry about what happened between us.” He could see the glassiness in her eyes, and his gut twisted. He never wanted to hurt her. What happened wasn’t about her. He agreed to help Olivia because she was upset, and at the time he was bored with college. Classes, parties, dating—it all seemed repetitive. None of those excuses justified inferring in Regan’s life, but when Regan walked through the door at that party, he wanted to talk to her and Olivia offered the perfect ploy to act on it.
“Sure, you are. I can tell you’re devastated by the whole thing,” she said sarcastically. “But that doesn’t mean I’m stupid enough to trust you again.”
He released his hand from her chin, letting it trail down her neck. “I never thought you were stupid, and for the record my feelings for you were real. It ended badly, but that doesn’t erase what happened before.”
“Seriously?” Regan scoffed. “I guess I’m confused or maybe my memory is foggy because I’m pretty sure Olivia painstakingly explained that you were never interested in me, that it was just a game, and you didn’t contradict her. You didn’t say one f*cking word. Not one. Not even when I confronted you. You shrugged like you couldn’t be bothered to acknowledge my insignificant appearance.”
Lucas lowered his voice so they couldn’t be overheard in the hall. The staff would love to gossip about the drama unfolding in his office, but he couldn’t let that happen. He had worked too hard to let a partnership offer slip through his fingers. “You don’t know how many times I wanted to tell you about Olivia’s plan before that night.” He ran his hand through his hair for the hundredth time. “Then when she confronted you, I didn’t know what to say. I knew I f*cked up. I had waited too long, and I didn’t think you’d give me another chance.”
She balled her hands into fists at her sides and her chest heaved with rage. He wouldn’t be surprised if she tried to strangle him. “You’re right! I wouldn’t have given you another chance then and I won’t now. Let’s stop talking about it. It’s pointless.”
Shaking his head, he exhaled loudly. There was no way he could explain himself because nothing he did six years ago made any sense. He’d like to blame it on his youth, but that was a poor excuse for his behavior. “When Olivia set up the whole thing, I agreed to talk to you, take you out for dinner, but that was it. I never intended to go through with Olivia’s plan. After that first date—actually, from the first second I talked to you—everything was real. I was with you because that’s what I wanted.”
“No, it wasn’t real. You asked me out as part of some convoluted plan to help Olivia hurt my dad by making me a laughing stock and guess what? You succeeded in ruining my life.” Regan choked on a sob, but she quickly forced it back down. She would never allow herself to fall apart in front of him. She had too much pride for that. “I had to transfer schools. I was everybody’s favorite punch line. I couldn’t step foot on campus without people talking about it. Olivia posted a video on YouTube called how to seduce a freshman in twelve weeks with details only you could have known.” She pointed her finger at him. “You told her everything. You made me look like a fool.”
Her words gutted him. Lucas had no idea why Regan left school. Nobody said a word to him about the YouTube video or Regan after that night. In fact, he hardly talked to anyone after the incident except Drew, and he specifically told him the topic of Regan was off limits. Within a few weeks, he accepted an offer of admission to law school, and he pretty much kept to himself after the whole thing unfolded. He was done with college, his fraternity, and Olivia’s games.
Sure, he still talked to Olivia on occasion, but only because of the connection between their families. He couldn’t avoid her when their families spent every Christmas in Vail together and every Fourth of July week at his parent’s ranch in Napa Valley. But Olivia would never mention Regan’s name. She knew better than that. He didn’t talk to her for a year after it happened, and he only forgave her because they had known each other since they were kids. For the sake of both their families, he decided he needed to bury the whole incident and move on. Besides, by that time, Regan was long gone and he didn’t think he’d ever see her again. “Regan, I had no idea any of that happened. You have to believe me. I would’ve never let that happen. I never intended to hurt you.”