Chance(20)

Irritation washes over his expression. If there's a loop to be in, Caleb definitely doesn’t want to be standing outside the perimeter of that. "You know where he is, don't you? You've talked to him."

I haven't. The last conversation I had with Asher was when he told me he was considering going to see his mother. He promised me then that we'd have a chance to say goodbye before he jetted off. "I haven't talked to him in a few days."

"Look at me, Rowan." His tone is controlled and measured.

I raise my eyes until my gaze is locked with his. "What?"

"I need to talk to him about a work issue that he left hanging." He exhales audibly. "It's crucial."

My spirit deflates almost instantly. "You're not worried about him? You just want to talk to him about work?"

If my words impacted him at all, he's masking it with effortless ease. "I need to speak to my brother about work. If you know where he is, I need you to tell me."

I glance down at my smartphone. I have every confidence that if I called Asher right now, he'd pick up. He rarely ignores my calls or text messages and during the infrequent times that he has, he's called me back as soon as he could. It happened the day he was arrested and I know that he's reachable if I need him. "I have no idea where your bother is."

His head bows as he considers my words. "I haven't asked much of you over the years, Row. I'm asking you now to find Asher for me if you can."

If he'd followed the plea up with any words of compassion concerning his need to know that his brother is safe and sound after being arrested, I'd be tempted to call Asher on the spot. That's not what this is. He's not looking for a way back into his brother's trust; he's looking for a colleague who holds the keys to a deal he has to close.

"I can't find him for you. I don't know where he is."

I hear his teeth tap a rhythmic beat as his jaw clenches. "You told Clive you were calling someone to make dinner plans. Who is he?"

I close my eyes and shake my head. "Don't ask me that."

"I want to know."

"Why?" My eyes pop open. "I don't ask you about the women you date. You don't need to know about the men I date."

"I'm curious," he says quietly. "I'd like to know his name. I may know the guy."

"You don't know him," I say shakily. "I can't keep doing this with you. You can't know every detail of my life."

"We're friends, Rowan." He looks down at his lap. "You're my oldest friend."

"It worked when we were kids, Caleb." I hear the anxiety that is coursing through me in my own voice. "It kind of worked when I was in college. It's not working anymore."

"What does that mean?" He scratches the back of his head. "How is it not working?"

"You exhaust me," I admit as my voice cracks. I look past his shoulder to my closed office door. I suddenly feel suffocated. "You hurt Asher. You want to know every detail of my life. You take so much. You're always taking from me and I get nothing back."

He leans his right arm on the chair's armrest. "What do you want from me, Rowan? What am I not giving to you?"

"Respect," I say clearly. "Honesty. You don't value anything I say. You knew that having Asher arrested would hurt me and you did it. You didn't think about how he'd feel or how I'd feel or anyone else."

"I was worried about telling you." His thigh shakes as he taps his foot quickly on the carpet. "I knew you'd be upset. I thought you'd understand though."

"You thought I'd tell you that you did the right thing," I correct him. "That's why you told me first and not Gabriel or your parents. You thought I'd back you up and reassure you."

"No." He shakes his head slightly. "I thought you'd see the value in what I did. I know you worry about him falling back into his old habits. I thought it would scare him if he was arrested."

"It broke him." My hands leap to my chest. "It hurt him. You're his brother. He's supposed to be able to count on you."

"I'm supposed to be able to count on him." He straightens his legs and I wonder briefly if he's going to jump to his feet. "He can't hide behind his addiction forever. It's not an excuse."

I stare at him as I try and absorb the words. "He's not like you, Caleb. He's nothing like you."

"You keep telling me that," he spits the words out through clenched teeth. "I'm sick and tired of hearing about how wonderful my f*cked up brother is."

"He's not f*cked up," I seethe as I slam my palm into my desk. "He's human. He's not perfect. He's just trying to make it through life. That's it."

His shoulders fall back into the chair. "You've picked your side. You actually picked his side."

I want to scream. I want to shake him until the boy I used to know floats back into view. "I chose to be a friend to Asher. That's all I've done."

He pushes himself slowly to his feet. I watch as he buttons his suit jacket and straightens his tie. "After what you went through with Tom you'd think you would have learned your lesson. I'm done trying to help either of you. If you want Asher, he's all yours and you can both stay the hell away from me and my business."