Bright Blaze of Magic (Black Blade, #3)(53)

It was still early, just after six o’clock, and the summer sun was still shining in the sky, streaming in through the windows and illuminating the shelves of books, magazines, and movies. At my passing, a few dust motes swirled through the air like lazy bumblebees before settling back down; everything was quiet, except for the faint hum of the air conditioning system.

I’d been sneaking in here at night for so long that it was strange seeing the library during the daylight hours, almost as if I’d never been in here before. So I wandered through the aisles, looking at all the books and running my fingers along their creased, well-worn spines. The air smelled faintly musty, like the books, but it was a familiar, comforting scent.

I thought about finding something to read or even getting a DVD out of the movie collection and popping it into the TV in the children’s section, but I was too restless to sit down and watch something. Besides, the last two days had been like I was starring in my own personal action movie. Right now, I just wanted a little peace and quiet.

So I kept wandering around and finally ended up in the children’s section after all, sitting in one of the kid-sized chairs, hunched over a small table, tracing my fingers over a star that had been crudely carved into the wood. Years ago, the very first summer we’d come to Cloudburst Falls, I’d used the sharp point of one of my bloodiron throwing stars to scratch the symbol into the table. I’d been obsessed with stars like the ones engraved in my mom’s sword, and I’d drawn, carved, and scribbled them on everything back then.

My mom had been horrified when she realized what I’d done, and she’d made me go over to the librarians and apologize to every single one of them for scratching up their table, even though other kids had already put plenty of graffiti on the furniture. She’d also made me do chores all summer long to save up enough money from my allowance to buy the library a new table, although the librarians had ended up buying new books instead.

I smiled, tracing my fingers over the star and its grooves in the wood, which had been smoothed out by time. We’d been so happy back then. I wished my mom was still here with me. She would know what to do tonight. How to protect Devon. How to save everyone. How to finally defeat Victor.

But I wasn’t my mom, and I had to figure all that out for myself. The thought made me miss her more than ever before.

“You look so sad,” a voice called out. “What are you thinking about?”

I looked up to find Devon standing at the entrance to the children’s section.

“My mom,” I said. “She used to bring me here every summer when we stayed in Cloudburst Falls. It was one of my favorite places to visit with her.”

Devon nodded, walked over, and sat down in the kid-size seat next to mine. “My mom’s told me stories about Serena. Sounds like she was a really great person.”

“She was,” I whispered.

Devon reached out and put his arm around me. I scooted closer to him and laid my head down on his shoulder. We stayed like that for several minutes, just holding and leaning on each other.

“I know you’re worried about tonight and what’s going to happen,” he finally said. “But I’m not.”

I pulled back and looked at him. “Why not?”

He flashed me a grin. “Because I’ve got Lila Merriweather, thief extraordinaire, watching my back.”

Sincerity shined in his green eyes, along with absolute certainty that we could rescue the others and not get captured or killed ourselves. It was a certainty I didn’t feel and a confidence—a trust—I didn’t deserve.

“Deah said the same thing to me right before she got captured,” I said, my stomach churning with guilt again. “And look how well that turned out.”

“Deah said that because she knows you’ll do everything in your power to save her and all the others,” Devon said. “Just like I know it.”

He kept smiling at me, that certainty flaring a little brighter and hotter in his eyes, mixed with another, deeper emotion, one that took my breath away with its pure intensity.

Devon cleared his throat. “No matter what happens tonight, I want you to know something—I love you, Lila.”

Tears stung my eyes, my throat closed up, and I couldn’t speak. All I could do was just stare at him, wondering what I’d ever done to deserve such a great guy in my life. The answer? Nothing—nothing at all. But now that I had him, I was going to keep him safe—no matter what.

I cupped his face in my hands, leaned over, and kissed him, pouring all the emotion, all the feeling, all the love I had for him into this one kiss, this one moment. Devon’s arms tightened around me and he pulled me over, so that I was sitting on his lap. All the while, we kept kissing, our lips, our mouths, our hearts fusing together time and time again, trying to make the most of right now, since we both knew this quiet would end all too soon—and that we might never be together again.

A minute later, we broke apart, both breathing hard and staring into each other’s eyes again. I wanted to say those same three words back to Devon, and I opened my mouth to do just that. But at the last second, I chickened out.

“I . . . care about you too,” I whispered. “So much that it scares me sometimes.”

And it did. So much so that I didn’t want to tell him I loved him too. I didn’t want to say the words out loud. Because I’d loved my mom, and Victor had killed her. I didn’t want to lose Devon the same way. Yeah, yeah, it was silly to think that just saying the words would put him in even more danger than he was already in, but I couldn’t help feeling it would be a horrible jinx all the same. So I bit my lip and looked at him, trying to let him see what was in my heart as best I could.