Blindness(55)

I smile as I pass him and get in his truck. He crosses in front of me, and when he gets in, he’s no longer pulling away, forcing distance between us. He’s not sitting close, either, and I know that’s on purpose. And while I’m grateful, I’m also disappointed.

We listen to the radio for the short drive to school, some classic rock station that’s mostly blaring commercials. Minutes later, Cody pulls into his spot by the tutoring labs. I’m getting out, but suddenly he’s pulling the door from me, reaching for my bag. I hand it to him while I slide from the truck seat, and he closes the door behind me. He walks me all the way to class, finally handing me my bag as we enter the classroom. He’s standing still at the top of the room, almost like he’s not sure if he’s staying or going. I look at him for some type of answer, but he just nods forward, urging me to find a seat.

I head to my usual spot, tuck my bag under my seat and turn, expecting him to be gone. Instead, he’s sitting in the very last row. I smile, and he just raises his hand from the desk with a half-wave.

Dr. Rush walks in behind him, and I turn back to the front, not wanting to draw any more attention in this class. The lesson goes quickly, but I don’t understand any of it. I’m scribbling notes, but I’m not focusing. I desperately want to turn to see where Cody is, but I don’t dare. I keep writing, hoping he’ll help me make sense out of it all later today.

When the hour is up, everyone starts packing, and I finally let myself turn to find him. He’s still sitting in the same seat, just where I left him, and he still seems happy. The corner of his mouth curls, his cheek a deep dimple, and I’m reminded of the first time we met.

He’s back.

“So, I didn’t understand any of that, I hope you know,” I say, not thinking, and leaning into his side. His muscles tighten at my contact, and he folds his arms across his chest, almost as if he’s protecting himself from me. His smile is tight-lipped, and I’m worried I’ve already ruined this progress.

“Well…I seem to remember a certain concert that a certain someone promised in exchange for tutoring?” Cody says, his eyes staying on mine, playful, and not shying away.

I laugh at his comment, mostly to buy myself time. I don’t think Trevor would mind if I took Cody to the concert. I just don’t know if it’s a good idea anymore.

“Sorry, I get it. We don’t have to go. I didn’t really expect to anyhow…” Cody’s already backtracking, and it causes me to take a leap.

“No, no…I just didn’t think you wanted to go…you know, with me?” I admit.

Cody stops walking and tugs lightly at my sleeve, turning me to face him. “I’d go anywhere…” he says, stopping short, and leaving me to fill in the blanks, unravel the words unspoken.

My head feels light, and I’m starting to sweat. Not wanting to misstep, I just smile. “Well, that’s good, ’cause you’re driving. Show’s next Thursday,” I walk ahead, in the direction of Cody’s truck, secretly hoping his eyes are following me.





The rest of the week continues the same. Every morning I get up and meet Cody downstairs. He even drops me off at my internship and is waiting for me when I’m done. Things almost feel normal, like this is our routine—what we’ve always done as friends. It’s Friday. He’s driving me home from tutoring, talking about the Killers, while I thumb through his music on his iPhone. When he’s not looking, I tap into my iTunes account and secretly download a few more songs that I think he might like, making a Charlie playlist. When my phone buzzes, I jump in my seat and quickly put his back in the center console. I look down at my phone in my lap and am torn when I see Trevor’s name.

I almost don’t answer, but Cody turns to me and smiles. “It’s okay,” he says, leaning his head forward, urging me to answer.

“Hello?” I say, timidly, like I have no idea who’s calling.

“Hey, baby. Flight’s leaving in an hour. Just missed you,” Trevor says, his voice happy and na?ve. “Oh, you sound like you’re in the car. I’ll let you go, drive careful.”

“No, it’s okay. I’m with Cody,” I say, not able to stop my words. I shut my eyes and brace myself for his temper, expecting a lecture.

“Oh, good. Hey, put him on,” Trevor says, shocking me. I’m not able to speak for a good four or five seconds. I hold the phone in my lap and look at Trevor’s name and picture, then turn to Cody, who’s listening to every word despite his laser-like attention to the road.

“He, uh…wants to talk to you?” I say, not sure if Cody’s okay with this. By the look on his face, I can tell he’s just as surprised as I am. I think we both thought Trevor would get back to Washington and forget about the bond they started to forge last weekend. Trevor never once mentioned Cody or his contract plan during my nightly phone calls with him. Of course, I never asked either.

Cody takes the phone from me and presses it to his ear with his shoulder; I struggle to hear both sides of the conversation.

“Well, I guess I have that…I mean, it’s not really anything formal, like written down and shit, but I can put something together,” Cody says. A few minutes pass, and I can tell he’s listening.

“Uh huh…Okay…Yeah, man,” Cody says, pausing and taking in a deep breath. “Seriously…thank you.”