Blakeshire (Insight #9)(51)
Her eyes fluttered open, catching me tracing her back with undisguised wonder in my eyes. Instead of casually urging me away, she began to caress my chest.
Her eyes drifted to my arm, and at that moment she jolted up and pulled my tattoo closer to her.
“I made it permanent,” I whispered to her as I leaned in and let my lips rest just behind her ear.
“When?” she breathed.
“When you were you sleeping.”
“It’s almost healed,” she said in awe.
I raised my arm to see the mark. The last thing I had focused on was the slight burn I’d felt from that mark, so I didn’t notice that not only was it not burning, but also the skin was not raised. It looked like I’d had it for weeks. “That is odd; it still burned when we left to come here.”
“Fast healer,” she said with a smile.
She rose up and got a drink from the basket so she never saw my curious stare, my questioning what else this goddess of a woman could heal—if she were the remedy to the cold evil I battled within.
I couldn’t hide my disappointment when I saw her reach for her clothes.
“I don’t want to leave here,” I said under my breath as I watched her cover her body.
“Leaving here is not going to bring me any regrets,” she swore.
“How sure are you?” I breathed. Because if that were so, I would never let this hold on time go, at least not until I knew she was happy.
“It’s not going to be easy to act like I don’t know this side of you, but I can handle it. I know we have to be careful.”
“It shouldn’t be like that,” I said as I sat up and reached for my clothes. “I don’t want to hide this. I want to stand you in front of my kingdom and tell them I found my soul, that a new Golden Age has begun.”
If it were only that simple. We both knew that my enemies were going to put me through hell, and I wasn’t looking forward to having her watch me proclaim love to Willow for the sake of a dying court.
“What we think about, we bring about. So just imagine that day over and over,” she said as she watched me dress.
“You would stand with me? You would rule with me?” My tone was so disbelieving that her gaze moved from carefully watching me dress to my eyes.
“I’m not going to wear some gown and stroll through that palace gazing at artwork, having people wait on me hand and foot and only look forward to stealing a moment alone with you or random balls and dances.”
So this is what hope feels like. “That will just be our stage. We can travel anywhere. And I’ll be damned if you ever have to fight for a moment alone with me.”
“I just know that even though your world is dark, others are, too. There are damned that need to be saved, wrongs that have to be righted. That is the freedom that I have to have, why Aden told you that smothering me would do you no good.”
“You don’t like to be protected?” That simply would not work with me. Did she not clearly understand how dangerous my world was?
She pulled on her boots before she answered me. “I like feeling safe, just not helpless. We all have a fate to fulfill.”
“I’ll chase your obsessions with you,” I swore.
She tensed for an instant. “I only want you to chase the ones that feel the same way about you. If you are just there to guard me, then you will not help me, but hold me back.”
I moved closer to her. Carefully, I reached my hand for her jaw as my thumb traced her bottom lip. I stared into her soul as I spoke. “You are my obsession. My air. I doubt that we would overcome what was between us if our views and dreams held any vast differences.”
“I don’t want to be an obsession.” Before I could argue, she went on. “Obsessions fade. I couldn’t tell you how many things I have been obsessed with, how I exhaust that idea or project until it blends in with life, until it’s accomplished, understood. The lifespan is too short for me to ever want to be one for someone else.”
“I can’t get over this, Madison Marie. You can’t possibly understand how much this time has meant to me. This is the first instance that I haven’t felt alone. The first instance that I felt like the hell I have been through was worth it.”
“I thought those were my emotions I was feeling?” she said with a blushing smile.
I raised my brow. “That is how you feel?”
“Why are you surprised by that?”
“Because I know love scares you.”
She looked away. I ducked my head to chase her eyes. She was scared to tell me she loved me. I knew she was. She thought it would be my death sentence. But I already knew that my death had been predicted. A braver man would not have encouraged any of this. He would have let her be. But I’m selfish. Even if my life was meant to be short, I wanted to feel this. Because if I did, it would all be worth it.
“I have no fear. Remember?” Halfway there, Madison Marie. She told me without telling me. Clever girl.
“When that comes back?” I pushed.
“I’m not walking away from you. I’m going to figure out how they hurt us in the beginning, and I’m going to stop them from bringing hell to us or anyone else.”
She reached for the locket that I was still wearing and squeezed it tightly.
I had to wonder why Zander had all but told me to come here with her. If I had led her to another piece of the puzzle she was piecing together. What did she know? And why would she not tell me?