Beyond the Horizon (Sons of Templar MC #4)(66)

Asher sighed and sat up, taking me with him. “You may not have been an Old Lady for three years, but you’ve been connected to the club. You know the way we live our life, our distaste for law enforcement,” he said slowly.

I looked into his clear eyes. “Yeah, I guess it’s different being on the sidelines and having to argue with your boyfriend over not killing someone.” I never thought I’d utter a sentence like that in my life. “It’s a lot to deal with. I’m already trying to pick myself up, this is something that has me in danger of falling down,” I whispered, the truth of my words slicing through my soul. I was still trying to figure out who I was after my mom’s death. Trying to understand whether being a nurse was what I wanted, if being who I used to be was what I wanted. If I did decide being a nurse was what I wanted, I had to study. Hard. I had to work harder to be able to survive. One of my scholarships had been dropped which meant I would need to pick up more shifts. My life would already be crazy. I didn’t need shootings in my living room. I didn’t need Asher consuming me.

His whole body tightened at my words. “I’m here to make sure you don’t fall, babe. That shit, it wasn’t exactly our fault,” he ventured carefully, and rightly so.

I leaned back. “The man getting shot by your brother was not your fault?” I repeated.

“He put his hands on you. Almost killed your best friend. What the f*ck did you expect me to do?” he bit out.

“Call the police instead of discussing the dumping of his body?” I suggested.

Asher’s face was granite. “Shit that Tucker’s connected to, means half the police are in his pocket,” he said.

It was my turn to freeze. “What do you mean, shit that he’s connected to?” I repeated. “And how do you know Dylan’s last name?”

Asher seemed to contemplate something before speaking. “Everyone knows the Tucker family, babe. They’re crazy sons of bitches with a lot of money and a heap of power. Crazy plus power plus money means dangerous. Dangerous as f*ck to be exact,” he clipped. “His family is into everything. Prostitution, drugs, arms. You name the pie, their fingers are in it.

“Dylan’s rich?” I asked in disbelief “He never even chipped in for groceries when he was here, regardless of the fact he ate everything in sight,” I complained. “What a ... dick,” I said finally.

Asher raised his brows in amusement. “I’d say dick is a kind word to call him, though you’re focusing on the wrong details, babe. He’s dangerous. His family is off the charts crazy.” His face turned serious. “The fact he’s been in your presence, in your house without you knowing who he is, what he is,” he grimaced, “f*ck babe.” He ran his hand over his mouth.

“Well, I don’t exactly run in those type of crowds, I just thought he was your regular run-of-the-mill douchebag,” I explained, not liking that yet again I was a clueless na?ve girl needing to be saved.

Asher’s face softened, as he stroked my cheek. “Of course, you didn’t know, babe, I didn’t expect you to….” he paused, “Bex would have. It’s not a secret, and she does run with those type of crowds, Lily. As much as you wouldn’t like to admit it,” he added, seeing me open my mouth to argue, “she should’ve been smarter,” he said tightly.

I leaned back. “So you’re saying it’s her own fault that she got beaten up?” I asked in a quiet voice.

“Shit no, flower, of course not. The blame for that lies firmly on Tucker’s shoulders. Any man that does that shit is no man…” he paused again, “but she should’ve known the danger in getting involved with a man like him.”

My anger was tamped down slightly. “Bex doesn’t exactly live a cautious life. You don’t know what she’s had to go through,” I defended my friend.

Asher gazed at me. “No, babe, I don’t. Everyone has their own demons. I know that. I don’t presume to know hers. But when her demons cause my woman to get involved…” he stroked my face … “to get hurt, it gets to me, flower. I don’t want you to face any more demons, your own or anyone else’s. I’d slay dragons for you, babe,” he murmured quietly.

I stared at him, a cocktail of emotion swirling in my belly. How do you respond when someone says that to you?

“You scare me,” I said finally.

Asher didn’t betray any emotion at my strange response, nor did he say anything.

“Saying things that like, it terrifies me,” I confessed. “Having you come in with your brothers, talking about bodies and killings like it’s a plan to go bowling, that scares me, too,” I whispered. “I feel afraid all the time. Afraid to be with you. Be without you. A girl that’s always afraid, that’s broken, isn’t ever going to be strong enough for that life. For your life,” I told him. “Bex was wrong before. I wasn’t going to do it. Shoot him. Even if it meant he hurt us, killed me even, I wouldn’t have had the strength to pull that trigger,” I choked out, feeling ashamed.

Asher moved me so I was straddling him, his hands grasping my hips tightly.

“You’re strong enough, flower,” he told me with certainty. “When someone breaks, they heal, twice as strong as before. You were strong before, babe, you’re stronger now. You’re strong because you’re gentle when most people would be rough. You stand when most people would fall. Strength comes in different forms,” his hand crept up my hip, “and you would’ve done it. As much as it pains me to say, you don’t have enough sense of self-preservation. You might not have done it for yourself, but you would’ve done it for your friend. I know that, because you’d do anything for the people you love,” he said with pride in his husky voice. “If I could have dreamt up my perfect Old Lady, she wouldn’t have been as good as you,” he murmured. “And that’s what you are. It might scare you, I’m man enough to admit it scares the shit out of me. When the world hands you something you treasure more than anything else you’ve ever had, all you can think of is the agony of losing it.” His hand moved to the waistband of my panties.