Baby Doll(2)

Sky hesitated but she would never disobey her mother. She bravely set the stuffed animal back under the covers and gave it a tender kiss good-bye. Lily layered Sky in several pairs of pajama pants, pulling three sweaters on until she was wrapped up tightly. She grabbed a fuzzy down blanket and draped it around Sky’s shoulders.

“Hold on to this, okay? Don’t let go.”

“Okay, Mommy.”

Once Sky was ready, Lily pulled on several pairs of tights under her pajamas. Her hands trembled violently; she worried that any moment he might return. But she just kept breathing, just kept telling herself if she stayed calm, they’d get out of here.

They were both ready but Lily had one more task to do. She hurried over to the corner of the room and worked open a loose floorboard. She grabbed a worn piece of paper, the note she’d written years ago, when she was still a child herself and the mother of a newborn. The pages were yellowed with age, but the writing still legible, each word painstakingly written. If this was a trap, there was no hope for Lily. She knew his punishment would be fatal. But she had to believe that Sky might have a chance.

Lily took the note and tucked it into the pocket of Sky’s pajama pants.

“Remember Mommy’s rules for the big adventure?”

“If you say run, I run. No stopping. No looking back. Find a policeman and give him this.”

“And how will you know he’s a policeman?”

“Because he’ll be wearing a uniform, and he’ll keep me safe.”

“You’re Mommy’s perfect little angel; you know that, right?”

Sky gave a brave smile as Lily lifted her daughter into her arms. Sky’s body was so tiny and birdlike; she felt weightless. As they slowly ascended the stairs, Lily found herself gazing down over the railing, studying this room that had housed them for the last eight years. No more than four hundred square feet, with its damp, dark walls… Hell on earth in every sense of the word. With each creaky step, she vowed she’d never return. She would never let him bring them back here. She pushed open the door again and they made their way through the main cabin. Seconds later, they were outside.

The cold air whipped Lily’s hair around, her face burning from the frigid temperatures. Sky gasped, wiping her cheeks as if she might be able to swipe away the cold. She clung to Lily’s neck, her body convulsing from winter’s brutal assault. But Lily reveled in this moment. With the snow crunching under her slipper-clad feet, she could barely contain her joy.

“Chicken, this is it! This is the beginning of our great adventure!”

But Sky wasn’t listening. She was gawking at the endless sea of white powder stretching out before them.

“What’s that white stuff, Mommy?” The one request Rick indulged them in were books. They’d studied weather and season patterns. Summer. Winter. Fall. Spring. But how could dear, sweet Sky really understand what snow was when she’d never seen it? How could any child raised in that awful, windowless room truly understand anything about a world they couldn’t see or touch or feel? Lily wanted to explain, to give Sky a chance to revel in these new experiences, but there wasn’t time.

“No questions, Chicken. You have to do what I say, when I say it.”

The sharpness in Lily’s voice was uncharacteristic, but she couldn’t worry about that. Sky grew quiet as Lily began walking. She forced herself to ignore the ominous, looming shadows the pine trees cast. With each step, Lily’s pace quickened. She refused to glance back at the nondescript cabin. Her walk turned to a jog, and then she was running. Her legs ached, muscles weak from lack of use, but she fought through the pain. She’d endured so much that this was nothing. Lily’s heart pounded so hard in her chest she thought it might explode. It had been so long since she’d been able to run, but her cross-country training came rushing back to her. She could almost hear Coach Skrovan’s voice telling her to “Find a rhythm. Find your stride.”

Lily ignored the cuts on her face from wayward branches and thick brush. She lost track of time as she made her way through the overgrown trail. She kept running until they arrived at what appeared to be the main road. Lily squinted, trying to make out the sign in the distance. As she grew closer, she gasped, stopping in her tracks. Highway 12. With growing horror, Lily realized she was less than five miles from home. Five miles!

The realization nearly derailed her. She wanted to drop to her knees and scream in anger and frustration. But she couldn’t. Focus on this moment. This moment was all that mattered. One foot in front of the other, she told herself.

She focused on Sky, who was whimpering from the cold. “You’re such a brave girl. Mommy is so proud of her brave little girl.”

It was difficult, witnessing Sky’s discomfort. But darkness was their salvation and she couldn’t waste any time. In spite of the cold, in spite of Sky’s distress, Lily realized that today was a spectacular day. She hadn’t had one of those in over 3,110 days. It was a silly game she’d played with her twin sister, Abby. They’d started tracking their “spectacular days” in seventh grade.

Spectacular was a vocabulary word. Definition: Beautiful, in a dramatic and eye-catching way. Abby, older by six minutes, was obsessed with Oprah and her happy-go-lucky philosophies. Following the talk show host’s lead, Abby had created a calendar to track their spectacular days. And so it had begun: the day they both made varsity track. The day they both passed their driving tests and sat on the hood of their Jeep outside the Dairy Queen eating their banana split Blizzards, reveling in how grown-up they finally were. And then there was the most spectacular day of all, when Wes asked Lily to go to the movies. Lily was the first one to be asked out on a date, but Abby helped her get ready, choosing the perfect outfit and doing her makeup. When Wes picked Lily up, she’d been worried that her spectacular day was not meant to be. He was quiet and on edge, not a trace of the carefree, goofy boy she’d been crushing on for half the school year. She kept pushing him. “Are you okay? Are you sure? What’s wrong? You can talk to me.”