An Alpha's Choice (Talon Pack #2)(41)

Brynn turned to him, tears on her cheeks but not in her eyes. The lack of emotion inside went through him like a sharp blade, deeper than any other tear or sob she could have shown.

She’d given up.

She was going to push him away.

He scrambled off the bed and cupped her face. “Please don’t make me go. I love you.” He knew it was the truth as soon as he said it. It wasn’t a last ditch effort. It was his heart, his soul. He loved Brynn Brentwood, and now he was going to lose her. “I love you, Brynn. I want you. I want everything with you.”

She blinked at him and bit her lip. “We can’t. You don’t have the bond, Finn. You can’t feel it. I can’t feel it with you either because it needs both of us. I’m dying inside. Can’t you get that? Can’t you see that every time we make love, every time you touch me, I’ll need more? I’ll just be reminded of the fact that we could have had something more and that I’m not going to get it. I don’t know if I could go on knowing that we are so close to having everything and yet have nothing at all. I need more, Finn. More than you can give. It’s killing me.” Her voice broke, and he knew she was on the verge of tears. It was sheer will alone that she wouldn’t cry just then. Not in front of him.

“I’m not enough,” he whispered, knowing the truth of the matter.

She shook her head, her face bleak. “It can’t be. Every time I’m near you, I break. I can’t do that.” She took a step back from him, naked, her eyes hollow. “I thought I could. I thought I could go on and be with you without the bond. But we’re not human, Finn.” She paused. “This wasn’t a mistake. I will never regret this because if I did, then I’d die a little more inside. But I can’t be with you and know there is no future. We can’t have kids without the bond, Finn. We can’t have a true mating. We can’t be recognized under the moon with our Alphas. We are from two different Packs and don’t have a bond between us. I’ve never felt your wolf, and now I know I never will.”

He swallowed hard. There was nothing more he could do just then. He couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe.

Finally, he took a staggered breath. “I’ll go, Brynn.”

Her lower lip wobbled, and she nodded.

He took a step forward and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. That she didn’t move back, told him that this was the end for her. “I love you.” She didn’t say it back.

And with that, he left.

Left the woman who should have been his, should have been bonded to him body and soul. The demon had broken him, twisted him up so deeply inside that he’d never stood a chance at a future with the one woman he loved.

The only woman he’d ever love.

She was his, and he couldn’t have her.

Fate f*cking sucked.

He pulled on his sweats and walked barefoot and shirtless outside, ignoring the looks and growls. His shoulder bore Brynn’s mark, but no one would be able to feel a bond that wasn’t there.

No one spoke to him as he got through the wards and went to his car. He drove in silence, his brain acting on autopilot. Somehow, he’d gotten it into his head that if he made it home, made it to the Redwoods, he’d find a way to make it work, or at least make it through the pain. He’d find a way to fix it all. But he wasn’t sure he’d be able to find it.

His body shook, his sweat-slick skin growing cold in the cool air. He could scent Brynn on his skin, deep in his pores. He wasn’t sure if he wanted it to wash away so he wouldn’t be tempted by the agony of what could have been, or for the scent to stay so he would never have her gone from him in truth.

He just didn’t know anymore.

He drove through the Redwood wards and made his way to Hannah’s home before he’d even thought about where he was going. The Healer had saved his life once before, maybe she could do it again.

It was all he could think of.

He needed Brynn in his life, and now that he’d had a taste of her, he knew he’d never get over the addiction of her.

He loved her.

And had lost her.

“Finn?” Hannah stood next to his car. He hadn’t even realized that his window was open. Or that she’d opened the front door and come to him. He gripped the steering wheel, his knuckles going white. “Finn, honey, what’s wrong?” Her eyes widened, joy blending with the worry. “Is that a mark on your shoulder? Are you mated?”

“It didn’t work, Hannah,” his voice broke, tears falling down his cheeks. He turned to watch her face as the truth set in. “I’m broken, Aunt Hannah. It didn’t work.”

Her face paled and tears slid down her cheeks, as well. “Oh, sweet heavens.”

She knew. She’d figured it out. Or at least had put a few pieces together. She’d worried about him ever since the attack, and now she had cause.

He was broken. Only, he wasn’t sure there was a way to fix it.

“Hannah?” Josh ran out of the house, Reed on his tail. “What the f*ck is going on, Finn?” He cradled Hannah close to him and Reed stood on the other side.

“We felt the bond pulse in agony. What happened?” Reed glared at Finn, but Finn couldn’t find the energy to glare back. Not when he’d lost any hope of having what he’d thought would always come. Perhaps not all hope, since he was with Hannah just then, but enough hope that it hurt to contemplate moving forward.