Always a Maiden (The Belles of Beak Street #5)(16)

She didn’t feel as though she actually learned anything. Well, except it was quite nice when he held her. She supposed there was too little time left before dawn to start their passion lessons in earnest. Perhaps he meant to go gently as he likely did when seducing a young matron. Perhaps he meant to kiss her before leaving. Her heart did a flip. “I did enjoy learning to waltz. Thank you for teaching me.”

“Did you enjoy it? Be honest.”

“I just said I did.”

“But would you not say the same thing even if you hated it?”

“I didn’t hate it,” she protested. She wondered if she should tell him that she enjoyed it when he held her after Lord Hull tried to guess her identity, but she didn’t think she could.

He drew in a deep breath and then said, “Tell me what would you do if you knew the world would end tomorrow.”

“That is a strange question,” she said carefully. The idea that she would do anything different baffled her. Although she supposed she wouldn’t worry so much about landing a husband.

“It is. How would you spend your last hours?”

She considered a few seconds. “Praying, I suppose.”

Her answer seemed to take him aback. “Are you particularly pious?”

“No. That is why I would need to pray. Otherwise what chance would I have of Saint Peter letting me pass through the pearly gates?”

He snorted.

“I wasn’t trying to be amusing.” But after a second she realized why it must have sounded funny and felt her lips twitch.

Evan stopped and turned toward her. “You’re smiling. You do know how.”

“I’ll stop,” she said and tried to erase the expression from her face, but it wouldn’t leave. Perhaps she was getting silly because it was so late—or it was just relief that he hadn’t given up on her.

But then the fog thinned and she could see her house just a few steps away. She sobered. “I don’t believe we have any entertainments scheduled Sunday evening.” They almost never did anything Sunday, unless it was to have the minister to dinner. “I will have to check with Mother about the rest of next week.”

“I’ll be waiting Sunday night half past eleven.” He bent near her.

His face was close and she waited for him to kiss her. Surely he would begin her lessons in passion with a kiss. His hand came toward her face and she reacted pulling her head back.

His eyes narrowed and he tilted his head to the side. Then he straightened, his hand falling to her shoulder and squeezing. “You should go in.”

“Will you not kiss me?” she asked. Then she was appalled that she had asked him to kiss her. What kind of woman asked a man to kiss her? Her ears grew hot and her face grew hotter. She snatched the key from his hand and inserted it in the lock, turning her back to him intent on escaping. Why oh why would she ask such a thing?





Chapter 5





Susanah wanted to die or get away, but she couldn’t seem to get the lock to turn. Evan probably wanted nothing to do with her. He’d probably changed his mind about teaching her passion or he’d never wanted to in the first place. “Or if you did not intend…I’m sorry. If you no longer want to teach me passion, you need only say so.”

“Susanah,” he said slowly. “I would very much like to kiss you—when I know you will allow yourself to enjoy it.”

She couldn’t make sense of what he was saying. She was so stupid. “I am so bad at knowing what to do to encourage…” She almost said you, but at the last minute she saved some of her dignity by saying, “a gentleman.”

His hands were on her shoulders and his thumbs moved beside her spine, pressing firmly, but it felt nice. “You are as stiff as a fence rung. In a seduction, a true gentleman will do ninety-nine parts of a hundred, but he will wait for the woman to provide the last smidgen of effort.”

“And you are a true gentleman?” Her head swirled with mortification. She tried to understand, but her heart pounded so hard it shattered her thoughts, sending them spinning away in jumbled fragments. She had to do one part of a hundred. Except she didn’t know what that part was. She didn’t know what the ninety-nine parts were. She’d never known what to do to offer encouragement, to make a man desire her. Stars above, she didn’t know what to do to make a man want to talk to her, let alone anything else.

“Only in that I would never hurt a woman or force my attentions on her.”

“Oh.” She realized with a fresh flair of panic that she’d been incredibly stupid to trust him, yet she did think he was telling her the truth. Yesterday, she would have scoffed at the idea that a rake like Evan was a true gentleman. He’d taken her to a scandalous place but hadn’t treated her scandalously. Well, only mildly so. Then again she had done something wrong—something that discouraged him. Something she unknowingly did with every man. “Will you teach me that part—that one-hundredth part that I am to do to encourage a gentleman?”

He gave a soft snort. Then he turned her back to face him and studied her face. “You really don’t know?”

She shook her head and stared at the ground.

“You pull back when you should lean forward. You step forward away from my hand on your back. You flinch when I reach to touch you. And you stiffen when I do.”