A Really Good Day(69)

But as I sat in that car, I realized that my searching was more pro forma than panicked. I hadn’t lost it. I wasn’t even really upset. What was the point, I thought, of getting all worked up? The operator had told me it would be an hour or two. What more could I do, other than drive myself crazy trying to solve a problem out of my control? At the time, I didn’t even notice how out of character this sensible thought was. Desperately trying to solve problems out of my control has always been my stock in trade.

From outside, I heard a loud (and familiar) noise. I got out of the car, tromped through the dirt by the side of the road, and walked around to the rear. My kids and their father were standing in a circle in the rain. Passing headlights lit them up, and I saw that they had arranged themselves into an impromptu “cypha,” and were taking turns beatboxing and rhyming freestyle. They spat rhymes about our car trouble, about the animal preserve we’d visited earlier in the week, about the beds they’d shared in different hotels, about the new food they’d tried (What rhymes with “egg hopper”? “Show stopper”! “Eye dropper”!), about each other.

The passing cars beeped at them, their drivers and passengers waving and shouting encouragement. My children waved back and kept rhyming.

My younger daughter noticed that I was standing a little outside their circle.

“Come on, Mom!” she said. “Your turn!”

I smiled and shook my head, but the others took up the chant. “Mom! Mom! Mom!”

Laughing, with the rain soaking my clothes and my hair, I stepped into the middle of the circle and began rhyming. Ineptly, foolishly. Joyfully.

I have no idea how long it took the car-rental agent to show up with the replacement vehicle. I was having too much fun to notice. Those minutes or hours remain my fondest memories of the trip. That day when I got out of my own head, stepped into the circle, and embraced the moment, in the rain—that was a really good day.





Acknowledgments


Thanks to Daniel Abrahamson, Peter Addy, Michelle Alexander, Julane Andries, Kristen Bearse, Paul Bogaards, Dr. Louann Brizendine, Sylvia Brownrigg, Sophie Chabon, Zeke Chabon, Ida-Rose Chabon, Abraham Chabon, Sean Cole, Amy Cray, Anna Dobben, Rick Doblin, Emma Dries, Clement (Clay) Dupuy, Dr. David Eagleman, Mary Evans, James Fadiman, Ian Faloona, Tim Ferriss, William Finnegan, Neill Franklin, Justine Frischmann, Madalyn Garcia, Peter Gasser, Mary Gaule, Ira Glass, August Gugelmann, Stephen Gutwillig, Daniel Handler, Zakiya Harris, Dr. Carl Hart, Jeff Holder, Dara Hyacinthe, Jennifer Jackson, Julia Kardon, Walter Kirn, Jenni Konner, Gregg Kulick, Alix Lambert, Yael Goldstein Love, Mabel, Larissa MacFarquhar, Dr. Shane MacKay, Maria Massey, Maighdlin Mau, Sonny Mehta, Dr. Michael Mithoefler, Ethan Nadelmann, Peggy Orenstein, Ann Packer, Kristi Panik, Danielle Plafsky, Michael Pollan, David Presti, Moriel Rothman-Zecher, Hans Ruge, Caissie St. Onge, George Sarlo, Nell Scovell, Ilena Silverman, Ann and Sasha Shulgin, Rebecca Skloot, Rebecca Solnit, Ed Swanson, Rebecca Traister, Gerald Valentine, Leonard Waldman, Ricki Waldman, Dr. Philip Wolfson, Amelia Zalcman, and Anne Zaroff-Evans.

And most of all, to Michael Chabon, who loves me, I know.





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