A Dom is Forever (Masters and Mercenaries #3)(34)

Did she really know what she wanted?

“I could open the door for you if it’s really that hard.” Lee’s deep voice brought her out of her thoughts, her fears.

She winced. How long had she been standing there? “Sorry.” She tried to concentrate on getting the door open.

Before she could turn the key, he pulled her around, pressing her back to the door. He invaded her space, taking up all the air and leaving her lungs in a hazy, breathless state.

His chest bumped against hers. “You are easily distracted. I need to give you something to focus on.”

He leaned over and brushed his lips against hers, his tongue coming out and lazily tracing her bottom lip. He swiped his tongue across her lips and then she felt his hand fisting in her hair, pulling her back as he surged into her mouth. What was he doing to her? She felt that kiss deep inside. It skimmed along her lips, lighting up her skin and finding its way to her breasts, her nipples peaking, moving lower.

What did she want? Oh, she wanted this.

She dropped the keys as her hands drifted to touch his chest. Even through the cotton of his shirt, she could feel how muscular he was. Every inch of him was hard and perfectly cut. He towered over her, making her feel small and delicate. She let her arms wind around him, pressing up to plaster herself against him.

He held her head, dominating her mouth while his left hand made its way to her backside, cupping her cheek and pulling her closer even as he pushed her against the door. She was trapped, and it felt so good. Out of control. She’d been out of control before, but that had been a terrible thing. This was a roller coaster ride, and she wanted to know where it led.

Lee pulled away, his gorgeous face flushed and hard. “Let’s go inside. I’ll handle the whole key thing.”

He knelt down and grabbed the key, opening the door in one swift move.

And she was right back to nervous as she followed him in. She wasn’t good at sex. The only experience she’d had had been with Brandon, and they had gotten pregnant their first time together. She’d been married a month later, and the pregnancy had been hard. They had lived with his parents for a while. It had been weird to try to have a sex life while she felt sick and tired and his parents were in the next room. By the time she felt good enough again, they had a baby and then everything had gone to hell.

She was practically a virgin, and he was a man who went to sex clubs.

What was she thinking?

She followed him inside and locked the door behind her. She was alone with him. Maybe if she just got through this first time, it would be okay. The kissing part was nice, but she knew the actual sex would be something she just endured. It was okay because she really liked the kissing and the holding afterward.

Her hand found the light switch, illuminating her small flat. There was only one bedroom, and Lee was standing next to it.

“Come here.” His voice was velvety smooth, making her heart race. He’d taken off his jacket, tossing it over the small leather sofa.

She hadn’t had many visitors. Thomas never came to her place. No one at the office seemed to want to be more than casual friends besides Simon. She hadn’t had girl friends over. It felt odd to not be alone.

“Are you changing your mind?” Lee asked. His face was a polite blank, all emotion gone. He stood there, his shoulders set and she just knew that if she turned him down, she wouldn’t see him again. Not because he would walk out but because she would never have the courage to try again.

“No.” She wanted him. She just didn’t want for him to know how scarred her body was or how much cellulite she had. She didn’t want him to realize she wasn’t really capable of having one of those crazy screaming orgasms that women in movies seemed to have. She wasn’t that girl, but if she kept the light off and made the right sounds, maybe he would think she was fully functional.

She was only going to be in London for a short time longer. This wasn’t forever, but she wanted him for however long they had. He’d been so open and honest. That was what she needed in a man. She hadn’t told him everything. She’d left out parts of her tragedy because she wanted him to see her as a strong woman he could partner with. If he knew about Madison, he would just see her as an object of pity. A childless mother.

What if he saw her C-section scar? Maybe she was changing her mind.

“Come on.” He held out his hand.

She knew she should run, but she just kept moving toward him, her hand floating up as though there was some invisible tether pulling her along and binding her to him.

A slow, sexy smile crossed his face. “You look like you’re going back to the Tower to stay as a resident.”

Yes. She could believe that because this whole episode could put her right back in the prison of her solitude. Now that she was here with him, she realized just how lonely she’d been. There had been no one to hold her hand, to protect her body with his. Her father had been wonderful, but he’d died. Her husband had been just a child really with no chance to become a loving man.

Lee was the first time someone had shielded her. It was the little things that drew her in. He made sure he was the one who walked next to the street. He made sure she found a seat on the Tube and then loomed over her like a bodyguard.

Lee was the first time she’d felt safe in years.

This had to work.

She let him pull her close, reveling in the feel of his body against hers. Safe was only one of the things he made her feel. Her body came alive the minute he touched her. “Kiss me again.”