A Devil's Touch (The Devil DeVere #4.5)(8)

Taking the steps two at a time, his boot heels struck the marble stairs leading to his and Diana's apartments. His drowsy valet, Masters, met him in his dressing room and immediately went to work, but the moment Ludovic was divested of his boots and tight-fitting coat, Diana appeared in the doorway. She looked wan and drawn, as though she hadn't slept, and Ludovic was instantly beset by a pang of guilt. Although he had not intended to wake her, in his eagerness to see her, he had made no great effort to prevent it either.

He was further unsettled to find, rather than a warm smile of greeting, a slight frown marring her features when their gazes met. "Are you all right, my pet?" he asked.

"Yes. I'm fine," she remarked stiffly. "And glad you are arrived safely, my lord."

But none too pleased to see him by the look of it. He shook his head in befuddlement. "My lord? I don't recall ever adopting such formal address in our bedchamber." He impatiently shooed Jacobs away and advanced toward her, arms extended. He was further flummoxed when Diana held back, making no move to enter his embrace.

"What the devil is wrong, Diana? If you are piqued that I left you alone, I can only beg your understanding that the nature of my journey was far from pleasure. Moreover, you must realize by this late hour that I left London like a madman in my eagerness to return to you."

"Was it truly eagerness to see me or did you flee from guilt, Ludovic?"

Her insinuation made the blood in his veins cool to ice. He grasped her firmly by the shoulders. "I won't play these kinds of games, Diana. If there's something on your mind, spit it out!"

She glanced down at her hands and his gaze followed hers, noting now the crumpled sheet of foolscap she held.

He shut his eyes on a groan. "It's not what you think."

"No? You receive an urgent summons from a former lover and then instantly hie off to London? What am I to think of that, Ludovic?"

"Damn it all! I did not intentionally hide her letter from you. It simply slipped my mind when Ned arrived with the more pressing news of Simon."

"Did you see her while in London?"

"Yes. I saw her," he snapped. "She expressed a dire need that I was in a position to answer. Would you begrudge her my assistance, Diana, when she played such a great part in bringing us together?"

"Why did she appeal to you, Ludovic? Surely there are other men—"

"It's a matter of trust, Diana. Look, we have walked this path before. I told you there is nothing between Salime and me. She was never my lover in the sense that you were…are," he quickly amended.

Her mouth formed a tight line. "No. She was simply a woman who willingly and regularly gratified your sexual needs. Needs you have not gratified with me in quite some time. Now she sends for you and you go to her just like that." She snapped her fingers accusingly.

"Because she needed my help, Diana. You know there is much history between Salime and me that has nothing to do with us."

"It has everything to do with you and me!" she cried, shoving against his chest. "Salime is exotic and mysterious and beautiful while I am now big…boring…and bloated!"

"Bloody hell!" He gave an exasperated groan. "Listen to me carefully, Diana. I have f*cked many women. Some were beautiful, exotic, and even mysterious, but I have loved only you. And your current gravid condition has not diminished either my love or my desire for you one iota."

"That's not true!" she insisted. "Everything between us has changed! You used to make passionate love to me all the night, Ludovic, but now we are like ships passing!"

"How can it not be different when you carry my child? You are easily fatigued and retire early, my love, when it is not my habit. Yet I still never spend a single night apart from you."

"And when I awake, you are already gone!"

"Damn it all! I thought I was doing you a bloody favor! Dr. Ford, who is considered the premier authority in these matters, confided to me that a woman needs more rest as she grows heavier with child. He strongly advised that I not press you for sex." He clawed both hands through his hair. "For the first time in my selfish life, I endeavored to place your needs above my own, and now have it thrown in my face as inattention!"

Her lips quivered. "Because I fear it will never again be the same between us."

He squeezed her shoulders, tamping down the impulse to shake her. "Why would you even say such an inane thing? Even worse, you accuse me of infidelity when you know how violently I abhorred the faithlessness of my parents' marriage! God help me, I would never allow the same thing to occur in ours."

"What was I to think when you don't even look at me anymore?"

"It's a bloody measure of self-preservation, so I don't go raving mad with my unsated lust. I told you I love you, Diana. I have poured my love into you with every ounce of my being! What further evidence do you require from me?"

"What evidence? I'll tell you what I need." She jutted her chin in challenge. "Make love to me, Ludovic. Right here. Right now. Show me I am wrong. Look at me with passion-filled eyes and prove that you still want me."

***

"You truly think I have lost my desire for you?"

"Yes. I think you have."

His expression hardened. "Then think again, my sweet." He came behind her and filled his big warm hands with her breasts while his hot breath skirted over her nape. "Does it feel like I have no desire, Diana?" He slid his hands down her sides to anchor her at her hips and ground his pelvis against her backside. Only the thin gown prevented his turgid shaft from sliding between the cleft of her buttocks.