Windburn (The Elemental Series #4)(57)

“You saw them put me in. You had to know.” I strode toward her, not caring that she was the mother goddess, or that she looked like my mother with her straight white blonde hair and blue eyes. Those eyes flashed.

“You are not my only charge, Larkspur. Others have need of me.”

“You said I was your chosen one, and so you’d leave me to fight for my life.” All the questions I’d pondered while hidden from the world bubbled up. “Did you feel me dying?”

Her eyes flicked away, so fast I almost missed it. I shoved her hard enough to send her onto her ass in a most un-goddess like sprawl. She gaped up at me, shock written in every line of her face. “How dare you?”

Behind me, Ash let out a moan. “Don’t do this, Lark. Please.”

Peta stepped beside me, pressing her body tightly to mine. “You felt her dying and you left her to die. Didn’t you?”

I dropped a hand to Peta and tears sprang to my eyes. At least there was one I could count on. Blinking, I stared at the mother goddess. “Do you wish my death then? Is that what this is? Some twisted way to see me dead? Perhaps Cassava is the one you wanted on the throne all along.”

My words didn’t make sense, not even to me. But they were every fear I’d fought for the last two years. Every doubt, every insecurity, every realization and every hope.

The mother goddess folded her legs under her and spread her pale blue gown around her as though she were the center of a flower. “Sit, Larkspur. Sit.”

I wanted to take my spear and run her through, but instead I sat and folded my legs. Peta lay to my right, but the tension in her body told me everything. She didn’t trust the mother goddess either.

Ash stepped up behind me, but didn’t sit. “I will stand with you, Lark. Even against her.”

I swallowed hard past the lump that grew in my throat. “No. This . . . this is between her and me.”

I tapped my fingers on my knee.

Peta let out a soft growl. “Griffin calls her Viv.”

The mother goddess jerked. “That is fine. Call me Viv.” I knew without her saying so that Viv was short for something else. Not that it mattered. Nothing mattered except this moment.

“Well, Viv. What do you want to tell me?”

She closed her eyes and her image shifted to that of a woman I’d met in my testing. Her long brown hair was the color of mineral-rich soil, and her eyes spun with all the colors found in nature. “You have only met one side of me, Lark. There are two sides to nature, and as such, there are two sides to my personality. I cannot dictate when one is in charge.”

I leaned back, pressing my body against Ash’s legs. “Two.”

“Yes. As there is beauty and light in this world, so is there darkness and death. I cannot tell you what the dark side of me is up to. She is completely blocked from me.”

“What does it matter that you have two sides?” Ash asked.

“Because without realizing it, she is playing Blackbird and me against one another. Aren’t you?” The understanding came hard and fast.

She tipped her head and a tear fell.

“I believe so. I can only guess, because I have no memory of what I do when the darkness takes me. I do what I can to hold up the precepts of light—”

“Cut the goose shit,” I snapped. “You are the mother goddess. You may have light and dark, we all do. But I will not sit here and listen to you tell me this isn’t your fault. Griffin said it. You’re meddling where you shouldn’t be.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Be careful, Larkspur. A chosen one can fall as easily as she can be raised up.”

I stood and stared down at her, my fists clenched at my sides. I had a plan, I just didn’t know how smart it was. “Perhaps then I’d be better off to side with your darker half. Perhaps she would see the value in me, the worth I hold.”

Viv’s eyes widened with understanding a split second before they rolled back. She tipped her head back and laughed, a long, low laugh that sent a chill racing up and down my spine.

“Oh, I like you more and more, little Lark.” Her head snapped forward and as she stood, her hair darkened to a blue-black as her eyes lightened. A haunting silver blinked back at me. “You wanted to speak to me.”

“You are working with Cassava and Blackbird.”

“You mean Raven?”

“No. My brother is dead to me. I mean Blackbird.”

Her lips twitched. “Fine. Yes, they are my chosen ones. Chaos, Lark. That is all the world understands. And even while you try to patch up the messes I’ve created, as you try to put better leaders into the families, you cause chaos. I think you are right. I think you would be better off with me at your back. I would have saved you.”

I took a step back, and Peta and Ash moved with me. “Then why didn’t you come to save Blackbird? I had him in my hands, his life was draining.”

Her eyes narrowed. “How could we save our two chosen ones at the same time?”

Without moving, I reached out with my connection to the earth, the flood of strength buoying me up. The mother goddess raised an eyebrow. “You wish to fight me?”

“No.” I raised my left hand and pointed with two fingers at the oubliette. Vines snaked out from the jungle, forking like snake tongues. They grabbed at the opening of the oubliette and wrenched it apart with a violent tear. “Stay away from me. Both of you. I will chose my path from now on.”