Soul of Flame (Imdalind Series #4)(86)

Ilyan took one look at what was happening and rushed toward them, his intent to block Ryland’s memories echoing back through his thoughts.

Is he all right? I asked, unable to take my eyes off my friend. The clarity of my mind that Ilyan’s magic had given me took away the monster that Cail had created for a moment. Right then, I only saw my friend, and my heart pulsed in worry. I reached toward the diamond that hung around my neck, knowing I needed to do something.

I was one step away from moving toward Ryland when he looked up at me.

My heart turned into a dark, painful fist at the look in his black eyes, at the hatred and pain that poured through him. In that one look, the veil of clarity vanished, leaving me face to face with the monster that still terrified me. I froze in place, my fingers still pressing the cold stone into my chest, unable to look away. Unable to move away from the raw hatred that stared back at me.

My voice curled and moaned as I forced my eyes down to the floor, the strange emotion leaving just as Ilyan’s words flitted into my mind.

His soul is destroyed, my love. I will help him. I promise you.

I nodded once at his words, even though I knew he couldn’t see me, and turned from them, needing to get away. Dramin sat at the table behind me, his hands wrapped around a large, earthen mug, another one at his side. He smiled as I caught sight of him, his head inclining toward the space next to him and to the mug I could only assume was for me.

“You always forget,” he said as I slid into the chair beside him, “so I came prepared.”

“Thank you.” I was unable to stop the smile that lit up my face, but it wasn’t for the mug. No matter how much my stomach turned in need of it, my smile was at seeing him, sitting on his own beside me.

“You’re okay.” It was a statement, not a question, my awed voice making me sound a little bit more like an amazed child than I had meant it to.

“Thanks to you, child,” Dramin said with his usual chipper tone as he lifted his cup to me, his eyes twinkling in a wink.

I wanted to smile at how familiar he was. I wanted to laugh and drink the Black Water, but I couldn’t, so I sat still, my smile fading somewhat as I looked into him. The question I knew I needed to ask felt like lead on my tongue.

“Are you mad at me?”

“I could never question your choices, child,” he said as he patted his hand against my arm, his motions slow and controlled. I raised my head to look at his green eyes that matched my father’s, and had matched mine many years ago, smiling brightly at me. “I might be very mad, however, if you don’t actually drink what I have given you.”

I smiled at Dramin and placed my hands over the rim of the cup, the warm steam of the liquid heating the palm of my hand as it filled. The warm aroma of honey drifted through the air, and I sighed, letting the scent warm me before the water did. I had just pressed the rim of my mug to my lips when Ryland yelled out, making my body jump and tense at the sound. I cringed and grabbed hold of the table, my knuckles turning white in expectation of him lunging across the room toward me.

Ryland hadn’t moved, however, he only sat, crying into Ilyan’s shoulder. Ilyan held his brother as he calmed him, his voice soft as he soothed him. Even though I could feel Ilyan’s anticipation of battle and the tense nature of his emotions, his demeanor remained calm as he held Ryland, working to soothe him. Wyn and Thom dutifully helped Ilyan as he pacified his brother while Sain… Sain stared at me.

My father’s eyes bored into me with a painful pressure that made me uncomfortable, his forehead wrinkled and I looked away, not really wanting to see the disappointment that would be there.

“Do not let him under your skin, Siln?,” Dramin said, the tone making it obvious he had witnessed the quick exchange between myself and Sain. “He is not ‘mad’ at you, as you say. Father just expects more from his children than most.”

I tried not to bristle at his words, but emotions pulsed and my head shot up, my eyes narrowing dangerously.

“Ha!” I said, the humor that I didn’t feel pushing itself into my voice. “I don’t see him telling you to buck up and go save the world.”

“And yet, here I sit.”

I jolted a bit at his words, the meaning as clear as day. Dramin had woken only last night, yet he sat before me, ready to run into the forest, ready to face what might be his certain death as well. While I knew Dramin was stubborn, I was aware that he wasn’t that stubborn. He probably wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for Sain.

I didn’t know how to react to that. Heck, I didn’t even know what to expect from a father. I had memories of scraped knees and bedtime stories, not of an immortal who would do anything to push his children toward their true potential.

I sighed and smoothed the lines that had taken up residence on my forehead, trying to ignore the truth that lay behind Dramin’s words.

“Trust your heart, Siln?. Your magic will guide you. Whether it be to heal me, to run from a fight, or to learn underwater basket weaving. Trust in who you really are. Tatínek will, too.”

I nodded once at his words, desperately wanting him to be right. This was not just about my father coming to accept me; I wanted him to be right about trusting myself and trusting my magic.

Silence stretched between us as Ryland’s whimpers increased, the sound of his pain as heart-wrenching as the nervous fear that lay heavy in the air. I took another deep drink of Black Water, attempting to drain the mug and push away the fear.