Runebinder (The Runebinder Chronicles #1)(42)

“‘I’m worried about leaving,’” Matthias read in a mocking, childlike voice. “‘What if something happens to Mom and Dad when I’m away? I know I can’t protect them, anyway, but I don’t know what I’d do if something bad happened. How do I know I’m not saying goodbye forever? I don’t want to go. I know I can’t stay here, not if I want to really live my life. But I don’t want to leave them behind. It feels like leaving them is the end. Like if I’m gone, something bad will happen. I don’t want to lose them. I already feel like I’ve lost everyone else.’”

Matthias closed the journal and looked up at him. Tenn felt hollowed out from having his words read back.

“How does it feel, Tenn?” he asked smoothly. “How does it feel to know that every one of your deepest fears came true? And that you were the cause of them?”

“I...”

“You will come to me,” Matthias said. “You are weak. You think you’re strong, that your training has made you hard, but deep inside, you’re still a lost little boy crying for his mother.”

“Shut up,” Tenn said. There were tears in his eyes. Why wasn’t the dream ending? Why couldn’t he wake up?

“When will you understand? More will die because of you. Even the friends who keep you safe—either I will kill them, or you will.” He honestly looked concerned. Like he was talking someone off a cliff. Then his mouth quirked into a smile. “You’re dangerous, Tenn. To yourself, and to others. That is why Leanna wants you. You need her guidance. You need her help, before you kill everyone.”

“I’ll die before I serve her,” Tenn whispered. He tried to build the fire inside him, tried to steel his voice, but being here, being back in this room, hearing those words... He didn’t have the resolve. He was weak. He was empty. He could never run far enough from this place to be anything beyond what he was—lost, scared, confused. Just like Matthias knew him to be.

“No,” Matthias said. “I know you, Tenn. I’ve seen into your heart. You won’t die. Not yet. You’re too cowardly for that, and Leanna wishes for you to be brought to her alive. You are safe, so long as you do not defy me. But your friends? They are not so important to my mistress. They will die first. Then, when you have no one left to harm with your protection, you will come to her, begging for forgiveness.”

Tenn looked at Matthias.

“If you hurt them, any of them, I’ll kill you.”

Matthias just laughed and dropped the journal at Tenn’s feet.

“Perhaps,” he said. “But the threat of death means nothing to one like me.” He leaned in close and whispered into Tenn’s ear. “Either come to me or do not. I’ll find you no matter what. And when I do, I will kill them. One by one. And you will watch them scream.”

His fingers dug into Tenn’s shoulder. Pain coursed through him, and the dark room bled black.

*

Cold sweat coated Tenn’s skin when he woke, and for a moment, he had no clue where he was. Then he blinked and realized the rumbling was from the car and the warm pillow beneath his head was Jarrett’s lap. He looked up into Jarrett’s face. He was sound asleep and peaceful.

“Bad dreams?” Dreya asked, peering back to face him. She was still in the passenger seat, Devon behind the wheel.

“I guess you could say that,” he replied. He slowly forced himself up to sitting, every joint in his tired body reminding him that he was not built to be sleeping in the backseat of a car.

“You mumbled,” Devon said. Which, in Tenn’s opinion, was a rather ironic thing to say.

“Sorry,” he replied instead.

Matthias’s words dug into his skull. He hadn’t seen that old journal since Silveron, but he knew deep in his gut that the words were true. What did that mean? Had Matthias found the journal? Or was the man able to claw into Tenn’s past and read every line of his memory? His chest constricted; if Matthias could read Tenn’s mind, whatever he learned would be fed right back to Leanna.

Tenn looked to Jarrett. He hadn’t had anything or anyone in his life he’d worried about losing since he’d found his parents torn apart in the garden shed. Not until now.

“It’s Matthias,” Tenn whispered.

Devon immediately swerved, and Dreya’s head jerked back. Jarrett mumbled in his sleep.

“Not here!” Tenn said, fervent but quietly. Devon let out an audible sigh. “He... He’s in my dreams.”

There was a long silence. Tenn immediately regretted his decision. He fully expected Devon to turn the car around, or for them to kick him out. If Matthias was in his dreams, none of what they said was private.

“For how long?” Dreya finally asked.

“Just a few days. Just after...after Water...”

She swallowed.

“Then we must be more careful,” she said. “If he is watching...”

He caught the subtext; she was grateful she hadn’t said where they were going. And she was wondering just how deep they’d gotten.

“Can you stop it?” Tenn asked. He hated how his voice cracked.

Neither of them answered. That was answer enough.

“It’s getting worse, isn’t it?” Dreya asked after a while. It was barely above a whisper. “Water. It is growing stronger. More violent.”