Queen (The Blackcoat Rebellion #3)(83)



“The world doesn’t exist because you gave it permission,” she said. “Things happen all the time that you and I and every other citizen who trusts the media never hear about, things the Harts don’t want you to know.”

“Like what? If anything important happened, everyone would be talking about it.”

“Not the people who want to live to see next week. The deaths of Yvonne and Jameson Hart, for instance.”

“They died in a car accident.”

“Did they?” said Nina, eyebrow raised. “Or is that what the media told you?”

I eyed her. The prime minister’s wife and elder son’s funerals the year before had been mandatory viewing. Seeing the Harts gathered under black umbrellas and watching the coffins being lowered into the ground—it was the only time I’d ever felt sorry for them. “Are you saying it wasn’t a car accident?”

“I’m saying even if it was, you would never know. But the world is out there, and it understands that the illusion of knowledge and freedom is not the same as the real thing. Eventually it will fade, and there are those who will do whatever it takes to make that happen sooner rather than later.” She set her hands on my shoulders, staring me straight in the eye. “Listen to me, because I will only say this once. You have a choice. You can choose to accept the hand the Harts dealt you, or you can pick yourself up and do something about it.”

“What, like scream and protest and get myself killed? It’d be better than this, that’s for damn sure.”

“If you’re going to shun the role the government gave you and live your life underground, then why not do something to change all of this, as well?”

“Nothing I do will make this better. My rank’s already there, and it’s not going away.”

“It only means something because the Harts decided it did, and we went along with it,” she said. “You are more than the number on the back of your neck, Kitty. Never forget that.”

Never forget that if I’d been born a hundred years earlier, I would never have had to deal with any of this? “I won’t.”

“Good girl.” She patted my cheek. “I trust you not to tell any of the kids about this. Not even Benjy. It’s safer for him that way, and I know you don’t want to get him into trouble. But you’re an adult now, and it’s time you learned what’s really going on. If you want to do something worthwhile with your life, all you have to do is say the word, and I’ll put you in touch with people who can help.”

I hesitated. “Who—”

A loud knock on the door made me jump. Nina wiped her hands on her apron and muttered a curse, and the tension in the air disappeared. “Don’t you dare touch anything,” she said, bustling into the hallway.

The moment she turned the corner, I dipped my finger into the bowl and hooked a gob of dough. It melted in my mouth, and I let out a contented sigh, the weight of our conversation forgotten. My last meal in the only home I’d ever known would include my favorite biscuits. That was a nice surprise. And all I wanted today were nice surprises, not the kind that could get me killed. Maybe once Benjy had his VI and was safe, I would talk to Nina. Right now the only thing I could think about was how I was going to survive the next month.

“Can I help you, gentlemen?” Nina’s voice floated through the hallway and into the kitchen, and I could tell by her tone that it wasn’t someone she knew.

“Nina Doe?” said an authoritative voice. Moving silently across the kitchen, I peeked around the corner, and a gasp caught in my throat.

An official dressed in black and silver stood in the doorway. Beside him, with a deep scowl on his face, stood the Shield from the market.

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