Queen (The Blackcoat Rebellion #3)(36)

Instead, word for word, I recited exactly what Daxton had told me to say.

My bravery wasn’t worth his retaliation, and I knew him well enough by now to know he wouldn’t take it out on me. He would kill Greyson. Or torture him in front of me. Whichever he thought would hurt me more. And whatever problems I was causing the Blackcoats by revealing myself to be alive, it was worth it for the small chance that Daxton would let Greyson and Lila go.

I stared resolutely at the camera as I spoke, but I could feel their eyes on me. Those forty-five seconds were the longest of my life, and when at last the camera turned off and the red light darkened, I dared a glance in their direction, only to find Lila staring at me as if I’d just gift wrapped the Blackcoats and handed their surrender to Daxton. Despite all the times she’d done the exact same thing, somehow she’d expected me to act differently,to take that risk.

I couldn’t. Not when their necks were on the line.

I’d done my best for the Blackcoats, telling the country my entire story just a few days ago. It was up to them to decide what they believed now. And if that wasn’t good enough for Lila, so be it. I was the one who had to livewith myself after this was all said and done, and I couldn’t do that with Lila’s or Greyson’s blood on my hands.

“Very good,” said Daxton, clapping delightedly. “You’re a true star, Kitty. I never quite saw it before all of this unfortunate madness, but you, my darling—you’re something special.”

“Does that mean you’re going to keep me and let Lila and Greyson go?” I said, and he stood, offering me his hand. Against my better judgment, I took it.

“Oh, no, no—I couldn’t possibly force them to leave the safety of the Stronghold, not when there’s a war raging out there,” he said, his eyes widening innocently. “You, however, seem terribly eager to leave us.”

“I—” I opened and shut my mouth. I couldn’t tell him no, not when he would jump on the chance to keep all three of us. But I couldn’t bring myself to say yes, either. “I’m worth my weight in gold, remember?”

“You are, and you just told the public everything I needed you to say,” he murmured, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. “I’m afraid my use for you has diminished dramatically, so really, it only makes sense that you be the one I release. Unless you’ve had a change of heart.”

He was going to make me say it. Of course he was. I relaxed as much as I could and smiled. “Not at all. As fun as it’s been here with you, I wouldn’t want to distract you from all the important work you’re doing.”

“Oh, but what a delightful distraction you are.” He brushed his knuckles up and down my jaw. “Your helicopter leaves at midnight. Don’t be late. I will miss you terribly, Kitty.”

“Maybe we’ll meet again someday,” I said sweetly. Plenty of people deserved to watch him bleed to death, but selfishly I wanted to be the one to slit his throat. He patted my cheek and finally walked away, leaving me to exhalesharply and fumble for my crutches.

So this was it. Whatever Daxton planned on doing to me—if he would keep to his word and drop me off in D.C., or if he would abandon me in the middle of nowhere and let the elements have me—I wouldn’t be here to protect Greysonand Lila. It would be back to square one for them, and I could only hope everything that had transpired that day would give one of them the courage to do what had to be done. Greyson was smart. He could figure out a foolproof plan to kill Daxton, or at least as foolproof as a plan like that could get. And Lila was braver than she thought she was. She would find the courage to carry it out.

Whatever happened to me, the game had changed now. The Ministers of the Union, the file—something monumental had shifted in this war, and none of us would be able to understand the true weight of it until we saw it in hindsight, but at least all of this hadn’t been for nothing. There was no turning back now—not for the Blackcoats, not for Daxton, and definitely not for the people.

I was halfway back to my room when the click of heels echoed down the hallway to meet me. At my slow pace, it didn’t take long for Lila to catch up. “I can’t believe you,” she snarled.

“If I went off script, Daxton would have hurt you or Greyson, and neither of you would’ve had any chance of getting out of here,” I said. “I wasn’t going to risk that.”

“And look how that turned out,” she spat. “We have to stay here, while you get to go back to your little bunker and save the world.”

“You think I want to be the one to go?” I said incredulously. “I’d give anything for you and Greyson to be the ones released. You’ve both been through enough, and Greyson especially—he doesn’t deserve this.”

“Oh, and I do?”

I scowled. “That’s not what I meant.”

“Then what did you mean?” she said furiously as she stormed down the hallway. “Because the more you talk, the less I understand.”

I gritted my teeth. For someone who seemed to hate Daxton, she certainly seemed to trust his word. “You realize there is a distinct possibility that this is a trap, right?”

Lila blinked at me. “And?”

Did she really not get it? “And by this time tomorrow, it’s entirely possible I’ll be dead.”